How to Give a Speech Without Crying? 10 great tips

How to Give a Speech Without Crying? 10 great tips

  • Filed under: Presentation anxiety , Public speaking articles , Speech delivery , Speech preparation , Stage fear

I am often asked for tips on how to give a speech without crying. At first, I assumed these people were just nervous or perhaps suffering from stage fright. However, I soon learned that it’s sometimes simply an overwhelming emotional experience to give a speech. This may be at a wedding, a funeral, or during a graduation party for example. No matter the reason—professional or personal—I have many tips for teary-eyed speech givers.

So, how to give a speech without crying? Take deep, calming breaths. Add some humor, if appropriate. Take a moment to acknowledge the emotions involved. Don’t forget to pause for reflection and composure. Focus on the mundane.

I’ll get into the details a little bit later, but these were some quick tips for you to use. All of that is helpful advice, but if you know anything about me at all you know I’m thorough. Of course, I have so much more to tell you. Keep reading to find my best-detailed tips on how to give a speech without crying.

Also, I think you should check out these books about public speaking, which will give you even more information and prepare you for the speech even more.

Table of Contents

How to Give a Speech Without Crying

Giving a speech isn’t always about sharing new ideas, selling your products and services, or getting ahead in business. Sometimes, we are called on to give speeches of an emotional nature. Even the toughest of us have suddenly been gripped by the lump in the throat and that urge to burst into tears.

And that’s totally okay. Sometimes, being overrun with emotions can work in your favor. Depending on the situation, you may be able to use the tears to your advantage. Other times, it’s best to keep your cheeks dry.

In either case, there are many things you can do to get through your speech without crying.

#1 Breathe Deep

When we are overcome with emotion or fear, your body will register stress. One of the first ways it does this is by restricting breathing and tightening your throat. You may even completely hold your breath.

Since you need oxygen in order to give your speech, any kind of restriction in breathing will really mess you up. That’s not even talking about the increased stress you’ll feel when you realize you’re about to pass out from lack of oxygen!

The easiest remedy for this problem is to simply take a long, slow, deep breath. It sounds so simple, doesn’t it? Unfortunately, taking slow and steady breaths when your emotions are taking over can seem like an impossible task.

This is where a little preparation can come in handy. If you know that you’ll be giving a potentially emotional speech, or that a speech you must give in a business setting may cause you to cry, it’s worth the effort to learn some simple breathing techniques beforehand.

Did you know that taking even one deep, calming breath may be enough to counteract your adrenaline and your emotions? If you don’t have time for a full set of breathing exercises while your audience stares at you, just take one breath. It may be all you need.

#2 How to Give a Speech Without Crying Using Humor

“Funny people aren’t funny because funny things happen to us. We’re funny because we take the tragedy that happens to us, and turn it into comedy.” – Judy Carter

Unless your speech is happening at a solemn event, you may try adding a little humor to ease your nerves and calm your emotions. You might be surprised to learn that some somber events, such as funerals, are actually appropriate for gentle humor, too.

The key to making humor work to calm you during your speech is understanding your audience . If these are friends and family and other loved ones, humor is almost always acceptable. In fact, your audience may welcome the release that laughter brings.

#3 Acknowledge Your Emotions

It may seem counterproductive, but acknowledging your emotions may prevent you from crying during your speech . The more you fight strong emotions, the harder it is to ignore them. So stop ignoring them.

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But how do you acknowledge your emotions during a speech without breaking down into rivers of tears?

Encouraging self-talk is the best way to accomplish this. Mentally acknowledge that you are emotional. Tell yourself that it’s okay to feel whatever it is that you’re feeling. It might be fear, it might be sadness, it might be absolute excitement that is manifesting as tears. Whatever the feeling, tell yourself it’s okay to feel that.

After you’ve acknowledged your feelings, take that deep breath we mentioned in the first tip. It’s incredibly cathartic to mentally acknowledge emotional energy, then release it physically through a deep, controlled breath.

Definitely, check this guide here on how to overcome stage fright.

#4 Pause for Reflection and Composure

Some of the best speakers use natural pauses in their speeches to emphasize parts of what they’re saying . But they may also be using those pauses to compose themselves. This is especially common during emotional speeches such as during a wedding or while accepting an award.

You can find good places to pause your speech ahead of time . For example, while you’re writing your speech, you’ll probably feel some of those emotions creeping in. They’re giving you a preview of what your actual speech may be like.

Don’t force those feelings away. Use them to identify places where you should create a natural pause in your speech . Those pauses are where you should take your deep breath and acknowledge how you’re feeling.

#5 Focus on Your Notes

One of the best ways to avoid crying during your speech is to focus on your notes. A well-written speech with useful notes gives you a low-key item to concentrate on. When your emotions start to overwhelm you, simply glance down at your notes and pretend to read them for a second or two.

It may not be the most graceful method to calm your emotions, and it certainly isn’t surreptitious, but it’s also not unusual to have a speaker look at their notes. As long as you don’t stare at your notes the entire time, it’ll look perfectly natural to glance down and regain your composure once or twice.

As a side note, I wrote an article about how to use notes in your speech which you can find here.

How to Give a Speech Without Crying? 10 great tips

#6 Focus on the Mundane

Maybe you don’t have notes, or maybe you’ve already looked at your notes too many times and your audience is getting suspicious. Whatever your reasons, you may need another option to stop your tears during your speech.

So, how to give a speech without crying if you can’t look at your notes? Change your focus.

Look out across the audience, avoiding any eye contact for now. Too much eye contact when your emotions are flaring may cause the dam to break and get the tears flowing. Instead, look out past the people. Find something in the back of the room that has no meaning to you.

Maybe it’s a poster on the wall or a stack of chairs. Maybe it’s the door out or a window overlooking the parking lot. Find anything in the back of the room that can help distract you from the overwhelming emotions tugging at your tear ducts.

#7 Take a Drink of Water

Have you ever seen those pitchers of water sitting next to a speech-giver? They’re not there for decoration. Professional speakers aren’t just really thirsty people either.

Water is usually provided for speakers for two reasons. The first is that speakers’ mouths often get dry. It’s simple biology.

The second is that taking a sip of water is a well-known way to relax your throat , give you a moment to compose yourself, and helps you focus on something other than your speech for a moment.

If you notice, taking a drink gives you the opportunity to use several of the tips already listed here. It’s an unobtrusive way to get through a speech without crying.

#8 Practice, Practice, Practice!

If you’re really panicking about becoming emotional and bursting into tears during your speech, plan ahead. Be prepared! You can breathe all you want, drink gallons of water, and stare at the windows, but if you don’t practice your speech ahead of time, you’re doing yourself a major disservice.

Practicing starts when you first put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard). As mentioned earlier, writing your speech will be the first chance you get to see where your emotional triggers may happen. Pay attention to those.

As you write your speech, stop and practice it out loud. If you choke up in the same places each time, mark those spots and move on.

Once you finish your speech, practice in front of a mirror or better yet – in front of the camera. Practice looking up at yourself (or at the camera) as you recite the speech. Glance at your notes often, paying attention to where you marked the emotional parts.

Take note of how you’re feeling as those places come up. If you feel the lump forming in your throat, try adding a pause before or just after that point. Practice taking a sip of water.

The more you practice and make it through your speech, the easier it will become . If you can condition yourself to avoid or work past those emotional spots alone, you have a better chance of making it through on the big day.

But there’s a lot more to it so I wrote a complete guide (10 effective tips) on how to practice a speech you.

#9 Choose a Handheld Distraction

Another good trick to avoid crying during a speech is to bring a distraction with you. Something small that you can hold in your palm, keep on the lectern, or hide in your pocket can help you stay calm and collected.

When you feel the emotions begin to rise, simply palm your distraction item and give it a good squeeze. If you practice with this item while practicing your speech, you may be able to train your brain to recognize it as the “calm” object.

It’s a bit like Pavlov’s dog. If you can train your brain to associate the distraction item with calm or intense focus, you can derail your emotions before they ruin your speech.

If you don’t have a pocket to hold an item or you aren’t able to bring something small up with you, you can always use your own hands. Practice ahead of time doing a casual hand fold on the lectern. While your fingers are laced together, you can give them a gentle squeeze to help center yourself.

If there is no lectern, fold your hands in front of you.

#10 Rewording Your Speech

If you still find it difficult to get through the speech without crying, even after all of this advice, there’s still more you can do.

Try rewording the most intense parts of your speech. Subtlety has its place in speeches, just as clear and concise word choice does. It’s okay to allude to something emotional without coming right out and saying it.

Chances are good that your audience is also feeling emotional, and rewording more intense parts might be a kindness to them as well.

Bonus tip: Use Emotions to Empower Yourself

You came here wondering how to give a speech without crying, but you may be looking at this the wrong way. Let me explain.

In some situations, crying and other shows of emotion can actually work in your favor. Look at the emotional speeches you’ve seen in the past as examples.

When an actor cries at the podium after receiving an award, your first thought isn’t that this person is a weakling. More likely you understand that the tears show the world how grateful they are to be acknowledged.

What about graduation celebrations? Those are notoriously emotional. Look at the tears that stream down cheeks during graduation speeches. Clearly, the people speaking have poured heart and soul into these words. Does it dampen the mood or take away from the speech because they’re crying? No way!

If anything, tears during a speech show your audience that you are invested in this topic. You care. You connect with whatever it is that you’re talking about.

Tears don’t always show weakness. In some situations, they show in an obvious, nonverbal way that you care deeply enough to be moved to tears.

Related Questions

How to talk without getting emotional? Keep your speech simple, concise, and on point. Breathe deeply in and out. Pause for composure and to catch your breath.

How to keep from getting choked up? Depending on the situation, you may be able to bring humor into the moment. Laughter helps relieve stress. It may be appropriate to allow yourself to become choked up anyway.

How to write a speech? How to write a speech depends on many factors. For example, type of event (official or unofficial), listeners (acquaintances or strangers), time (short or long speech), etc. (read full article here )

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Janek Tuttar

Hi! My name is Janek Tuttar, and I am the founder and author of SpeakAndConquer.com.

I have been teaching and blogging about public speaking since spring 2007. Here, I am sharing the wisdom of how to cope in different public speaking situations.

Send me an e-mail: [email protected]

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A simple trick to help you speak in public without showing your nerves

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how to give a speech without getting emotional

You don’t have to put up with a thin, shaky voice, says speech-language pathologist Jackie Gartner-Schmidt.

Every weekday for the month of January, TED Ideas is publishing a new post in a series called “How to Be a Better Human,” containing a helpful piece of advice from a speaker in the TED community. To see all the posts, click here .

Ever given a presentation and felt like your throat was closing up or that there was a big lump in it? Or made an important request of your boss but thought your voice sounded as shaky as Jello on a trampoline?

Turns out, you don’t suffer from some unexplained physical malady. There’s an anatomical explanation for what happens to our voices when we’re under pressure, says speech-language pathologist and University of Pittsburgh professor Jackie Gartner-Schmidt .

All humans have vocal cords — also called vocal folds since they’re folds of tissue — which sit on top of our windpipes, right behind the Adam’s apple. “The real reason we have vocal folds is to protect ourselves,” says Gartner-Schmidt. In fact, they do the very important work of preventing us from inhaling water into our lungs whenever we drink something.

But researchers have found “in experimentally induced stressful situations — be it public speaking, hearing a loud startle sound or having cold water put on your body — that the muscles around the voice box and the muscles actually inside the voice box [a.k.a. the vocal folds] react,” says Gartner-Schmidt. “They activate, and in some cases, they close altogether.”

Of course, no one wants to sound shaky, squeaky or choked up when they speak. As Gartner-Schmidt puts it, “We want our voice to reflect our strengths, not our weaknesses.” She says, “in study after study a high-pitched voice has been correlated with the perception of anxiety, not being competent, not being strong, and not being trustworthy.”

And this matters more and more now, as many of our meetings and interviews take place over conference calls or low-res video chats. As a result, says Gartner-Schmidt, “the voice is substantially taking over more and more of how we are perceived.”

To avoid this, she suggests doing this easy exercise (which she calls one of her favorites).

Hold up your index finger a few inches in front of your mouth. As you exhale steadily, make a “Wooooooo” noise (think: little kid pretending to be a ghost) for 5 to 10 seconds. Do this 5 to 10 times. (Watch her demonstrate it here .)

“This … essentially relaxes the vocal folds,” says Gartner-Schmidt. “It establishes breath and air flow and voice stability, which is the cornerstone of any strong, clear voice.”

Right before the next important occasion in which you have to speak — for work, for the toast you’re giving at a wedding, for a speech to a community board — take Gartner-Schmidt’s advice and “spend some time finding your best voice.”

Watch her TEDxPittsburgh talk here:

About the author

Mary Halton is a science journalist based in the Pacific Northwest. You can find her on Twitter at @maryhalton

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Public Speaking Without Getting Emotional

how to give a speech without getting emotional

Public speaking is one of the most feared activities in the world. And for good reason: it can be terrifying to stand up in front of a group of people and deliver a presentation. But what’s even more frightening is giving a speech and feeling overwhelmed by your emotions. When that happens, you can lose focus, stumble over your words, and make a fool of yourself!

Learn to control your emotions and speak confidently in public. I’ll share some tips to help you. Knowing how to manage tears can give you an advantage in some situations, but sometimes, it’s best to stay composed.

1. Understand Your Emotions

2. prepare mentally and physically, 3. use visualization techniques, 4.  practice breathing exercises before your speech, 5.  add a little humor, 1.  take deep breaths, 2.  distract yourself, 3.  shift your eye focus, 4. take a pause, 5.  acknowledge your emotions, how to public speak without getting emotional.

The first step to controlling your emotions is to understand them. What triggers them? A certain audience member? A specific topic? The stakes involved? Once you identify these triggers, you can prepare and learn to manage those situations.

The better prepared you are, the less likely you’ll get emotional during public speaking. Know your material inside and out, and practice your delivery until it’s perfect.

This technique helps athletes prep for competition and works well for public speakers too. Picture yourself giving an outstanding speech, staying calm and in control. See yourself handling tough questions effortlessly. Visualize success to boost your chances of achieving it.

Feeling nervous often leads to shallow, rapid breathing, which can increase anxiety. Combat this by practicing deep breathing exercises before your speech. Inhale deeply through your nose, hold for a few seconds, and exhale slowly through your mouth. Repeat several times.

If you can lighten the mood and make your audience laugh, it’ll help you relax. Don’t force it if it’s not natural, but adding a little humor goes a long way. It helps you stay calm and keeps emotions in check.

Here are some tips to manage your emotions when public speaking. The better prepared you are, the more self-assured you’ll feel, reducing the chance of getting emotional. Take the time to prepare both mentally and physically, and you’ll be ready to give an excellent speech!

What to Do When You Start to Feel Emotional During a Speech?

Emotions are inevitable, but there are things you can do to get them under control. If you start to feel emotional during a speech, here are a few tips to help you regain your composure :

This will help you relax and reduce your heart rate. It’s old advice, but it works wonders!

If you can’t stop the emotions, try distracting yourself. Carry a small object in your pocket or palm to fiddle with when you start feeling emotional.

By observing your surroundings and concentrating on simple details, like the wall color or the green grass, you can distance yourself from emotional stress.

Take a quick pause to drink water or give yourself a positive pep talk. Your audience won’t mind, and the break will help you re-center and focus on your task.

Don’t hold back your emotions. Acknowledge them to manage them. If you’re nervous or scared, take a deep breath and tell yourself, “It’s okay. I’m feeling _____ but I can handle this.”

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control emotions while speaking

Effective communication is not just about the words we speak; it’s also about how we manage our emotions while conveying our message. Whether it’s delivering a presentation, participating in a meeting, or engaging in a conversation, our emotions can profoundly influence the way we communicate with others. In particular, the ability to control emotions while speaking is essential for delivering a confident and compelling message. This article explores the strategies individuals can employ to keep their cool while speaking, addressing common challenges, potential consequences of unmanaged emotions, and scientific findings supporting effective techniques. By mastering these strategies, individuals can enhance their communication skills, build confidence, and succeed in various speaking engagements, both personally and professionally.

How Do Emotions Influence Our Capacity to Communicate Effectively?

What are the common challenges people face when trying to control their emotions while speaking, is having emotions always a bad thing, are there studies supporting emotion control techniques in speech, what strategies can individuals employ to control emotions before speaking engagements.

Emotions are a big part of how we communicate effectively . They can shape how we express ourselves to others. When we’re feeling excited or passionate, it can make our communication more lively and convincing. But if we’re feeling scared, angry, or nervous, it can make us stumble over our words or struggle to get our point across.

Our emotions also show in how we act without speaking. Like, our facial expressions, body language, tone of voice, and gestures all give away how we’re feeling. Sometimes, even if we say one thing, our nonverbal cues can say something different, which can confuse people.

And it’s not just about how we express ourselves; our emotions also affect how well we listen and understand others. If we’re too wrapped up in our feelings, it can be hard to get where someone else is coming from or to connect with them emotionally.

So, yeah, emotions are pretty important when it comes to communication. Learning to recognize and handle our emotions can make us better communicators and help us get along better with others.

Nervousness:

When individuals feel anxious or nervous before speaking, their bodies may react with physiological responses such as trembling hands, dry mouth, or increased heart rate. These physical manifestations of nervousness can exacerbate emotional turmoil, making it challenging to maintain a calm and composed demeanor while speaking.

Fear of Judgment:

The fear of being judged or criticized by others can stem from a desire for acceptance or a fear of failure. This fear may be particularly acute in situations where individuals feel exposed or vulnerable, such as public speaking engagements. Concerns about negative evaluation can heighten emotional sensitivity, making it difficult to manage reactions effectively.

Self-Doubt:

Feelings of self-doubt or imposter syndrome can undermine confidence and contribute to emotional instability while speaking. Individuals may question their abilities or feel unworthy of their role, leading to heightened anxiety and self-consciousness during speaking engagements.

The pressure of the moment, coupled with high expectations or perceived stakes, can create a sense of overwhelm that overwhelms individuals emotionally. Feeling inundated by the magnitude of the task at hand can trigger stress responses, making it challenging to regulate emotions and stay focused on effective communication.

Past Trauma:

Previous negative experiences with public speaking or traumatic events can leave emotional scars that resurface during speaking engagements. Memories of failure or humiliation may trigger intense emotional reactions, such as fear, shame, or panic, which can be difficult to manage in the present moment.

Perfectionism:

Striving for perfection or fearing failure can create immense pressure to perform flawlessly, leading to heightened stress and anxiety. Perfectionistic tendencies may result in unrealistic expectations and a constant fear of making mistakes, which can impede emotional regulation and detract from effective communication.

Lack of Preparation:

Insufficient preparation or unfamiliarity with the topic can amplify feelings of uncertainty and insecurity, contributing to heightened emotional distress. Without adequate preparation, individuals may feel ill-equipped to handle unexpected challenges or questions, leading to increased anxiety and difficulty controlling emotions.

Physical Symptoms:

Physical symptoms triggered by emotional responses, such as trembling hands, sweating, or a dry mouth, can be not only discomforting but also distracting during speaking engagements. These physiological manifestations of emotional arousal can interfere with clear communication and exacerbate feelings of nervousness or tension.

Distractions:

External distractions or interruptions during speaking engagements can disrupt concentration and exacerbate emotional instability. Whether it’s background noise, technical issues , or unexpected interruptions, external disturbances can make it challenging to maintain focus and composure while speaking.

Pressure to Perform:

The pressure to meet or exceed expectations, whether self-imposed or external, can create a significant burden that weighs heavily on individuals during speaking engagements. The fear of falling short or disappointing others can intensify emotional responses, making it harder to regulate emotions and deliver a confident and effective presentation.

Emotions are an intrinsic aspect of human existence, shaping our experiences and influencing our interactions with the world around us. However, the question often arises: Is having emotions always a bad thing? While some may argue that emotions can lead to irrational behavior or cloud judgment, it is essential to recognize the multifaceted nature of emotions and their potential to enrich our lives.

For example, Weddings are a celebration of love and unity, marked by heartfelt speeches that often evoke a range of emotions in both the speakers and the audience. Consider the maid of honor delivering a speech filled with anecdotes and heartfelt sentiments about the bride and groom. As she recounts cherished memories and expresses her love and support, tears may flow freely, not only from her but also from those listening. In this moment, emotions are not perceived as a hindrance but rather as a testament to the depth of human connection and the significance of the occasion.

While emotions can be overwhelming at times, they possess the potential to serve as powerful tools for communication and connection. Instead of suppressing or dismissing emotions, it is essential to learn how to channel them effectively. One way to achieve this is by cultivating emotional intelligence , which involves recognizing, understanding, and managing one’s own emotions as well as those of others. Hence, through this blog we can learn how to channelize emotions in an effective way while delivering a speech.

Yes, numerous scientific findings and studies support the effectiveness of certain strategies in controlling emotions while speaking. Here are some examples:

1. Positive Self-Talk:

Scientific evidence supports the efficacy of positive self-talk in reducing anxiety and improving performance in various domains, including public speaking. By replacing negative or self-critical thoughts with affirming and encouraging statements, individuals can boost their confidence, reduce self-doubt, and enhance their emotional well-being while speaking.

2. Power Posing:

While some initial studies on power posing have garnered attention, subsequent research has produced mixed results regarding its effectiveness in altering hormone levels or improving performance. However, adopting confident body postures before speaking engagements may still have psychological benefits, such as enhancing subjective feelings of power and reducing feelings of stress.

3. Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT):

CBT-based interventions, which focus on identifying and challenging maladaptive thoughts and behaviors, are effective in reducing public speaking anxiety. By addressing cognitive distortions and implementing coping strategies, individuals can learn to manage their emotions more effectively and improve their speaking confidence.

Overall, scientific research provides empirical support for the effectiveness of various strategies in controlling emotions while speaking. However, individual differences and contextual factors may influence the efficacy of these strategies, highlighting the importance of personalized approaches and continued research in this area.

Strategies that individuals can employ to manage nerves, anxiety, or control emotions before speaking engagements include:

1. Preparation and Practice:

Thorough preparation and rehearsal can boost confidence and reduce anxiety by increasing familiarity with the material and the speaking environment. Practice allows individuals to refine their delivery, anticipate potential challenges, and feel more in control of the situation.

2. Visualization and Positive Affirmations:

Engaging in visualization exercises where individuals imagine themselves delivering a successful presentation can help reduce anxiety and build confidence. Additionally, repeating positive affirmations or self-talk statements can counter negative thoughts and bolster self-belief.

3. Deep Breathing and Relaxation Techniques:

Practicing deep breathing exercises or progressive muscle relaxation can help calm the body’s physiological responses to stress and anxiety. These techniques promote relaxation and reduce tension, allowing individuals to approach speaking engagements with greater composure. Research has shown that diaphragmatic breathing techniques, which involve deep abdominal breathing, can reduce physiological indicators of stress and anxiety, such as heart rate and cortisol levels. Studies suggest that practicing diaphragmatic breathing before speaking engagements can promote relaxation and emotional regulation.

4. Mindfulness and Meditation:

Incorporating mindfulness practices or meditation into daily routines can enhance self-awareness and emotional regulation. By focusing on the present moment and observing thoughts and feelings without judgment, individuals can cultivate a sense of calm and resilience in the face of stressors.

5. Setting Realistic Expectations :

Managing expectations and reframing perfectionistic tendencies can alleviate pressure and reduce anxiety before speaking engagements. Recognizing that imperfection is a natural part of the process can foster self-compassion and ease fears of failure.

6. Physical Exercise and Stress Reduction:

Engaging in regular physical activity, such as walking, yoga, or jogging, can release endorphins and reduce stress levels. Incorporating stress-reducing activities into daily routines can promote overall well-being and resilience to anxiety.

7. Seeking Support:

Talking to trusted friends, mentors, or mental health professionals about fears and anxieties related to speaking engagements can provide valuable support and perspective. Seeking reassurance and guidance from others can help individuals feel less isolated in their struggles and more empowered to manage emotions effectively.

8. Focusing on the Message:

Shifting the focus away from personal fears or insecurities and towards the message being conveyed can help individuals stay grounded and confident. Emphasizing the importance of the content and its impact on the audience can help individuals channel their energy into effective communication rather than dwelling on their own emotions.

Conclusion 

In conclusion, mastering the art of controlling emotions while speaking is a crucial skill that can significantly enhance both personal and professional communication. Emotions play a pivotal role in shaping how we express ourselves and connect with others, making it essential to recognize and manage them effectively. By understanding the influence of emotions on communication, identifying common challenges, and implementing proven strategies, individuals can navigate speaking engagements with confidence and composure.

The challenges individuals face, such as nervousness, fear of judgment, and self-doubt, are common experiences that can be addressed through preparation, mindfulness, and positive self-talk. Employing techniques like diaphragmatic breathing, visualization, and progressive muscle relaxation can help alleviate anxiety and promote relaxation before speaking engagements. Moreover, setting realistic expectations and focusing on the message can shift the emphasis away from personal insecurities and enhance overall performance.

Failing to manage emotions effectively while speaking can have detrimental consequences, including decreased performance, impaired communication, and damaged relationships. However, scientific findings support the effectiveness of various strategies in controlling emotions, providing individuals with evidence-based tools to navigate speaking situations with confidence and poise.

In essence, by honing their emotional intelligence and implementing proven techniques, individuals can enhance their communication skills, build credibility, and foster meaningful connections with their audience. Keep your cool, and with practice and perseverance, speaking engagements can become opportunities for growth, learning, and success.

Check this out for more information. 

Hrideep Barot

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How to Control Your Emotions When Speaking: 10 Tips

by Rob Biesenbach | Presentation/Speech Tips

control emotions

Most of us have experienced some level of stress or even trauma as a result of the pandemic. So it’s natural to be feeling a little “raw” emotionally and unpracticed socially as we reenter the real world.

In this environment, emotions can unexpectedly rise to the surface and catch us off guard in the most ordinary circumstances, like catching up with co-workers or speaking up at meetings,

To say nothing of the usual high-stress situations we know are going to pose challenges: interviewing for a job, communicating a tough message in a presentation, revealing something personal about ourselves at a teambuilding event or delivering a toast or eulogy.

We’ve All Been There

During the height (or depth) of the pandemic, I was sleep deprived and stressed out juggling the demands of my business with my wife’s own busy career, all while dealing with two children under five in the house.

It’s safe to say I was not at my best!

During an otherwise ordinary conversation with some colleagues on Zoom, I confessed that I was struggling to be the professional I want to be and the father my kids need me to be.

I almost didn’t get through the sentence. My throat caught, my face flushed and my voice broke.

If you’ve had a similar experience, whether in bad times or good, here are some ways you can control your emotions, maintain your composure and get through these occasions successfully.

1. Give Yourself a Break

First, know that it’s okay. Yes, losing a bit of control, especially in a work setting, can be uncomfortable or embarrassing. (And for women, of course, it’s especially perilous as it plays right into traditional stereotypes and biases.)

But try to keep in mind that we’ve all been there and most of us (the good ones, at least) understand.

2. Practice Aloud

When you are able to anticipate a tough emotional moment it can be helpful to talk it out. Rehearse your message over and over, out loud, until you feel reasonably comfortable with it.

3. Understand Your Emotional Triggers

If there are parts of your message that are especially tough, think about how you can rephrase, reposition or steer around them.

4. But Be Ready for Surprises

One of the toughest messages I’ve had to deliver was my father’s eulogy . I was ready for what I thought would be the hardest parts — the big moments. But it was a seemingly innocuous and unessential detail that tripped me up.

Describing a childhood fishing trip, I noted that at the end of the day my dad baited my hook with the last piece of shrimp from the bucket. Suddenly a rush of emotions came out of nowhere — thinking about him looking out for me as the “baby” of the family, feeling underserving of the privilege versus my siblings, and more.

So, yes, prepare — but also beware!

5. Be Careful With Eye Contact

Normally I advise speakers to look audience members in the eye . But that can be tough under difficult circumstances. Believe it or not, in these moments, looking at people you DON’T know well may be easier than connecting with those you’re close to.

6. Tune in to Your Body

Get a sense of the physical sensations that indicate you’re about to lose control. We all have our own “tells” — flushed skin, a crack in the voice, wobbly knees, that weird “out of body” floating feeling. When you start to feel that, manage it with the next few steps.

Also, something I always tell people in my presentation workshops is that nobody can see your knees shaking or your hands trembling. Except perhaps when you’re holding a piece of paper in your hand. So if you need notes, keep your hand down to your side when you’re not referring to them. And put them on stiff index cards so they don’t flutter as you do.

7. Breathe, Breathe, Breathe

Proper breathing is fundamental to disciplines as diverse as acting, yoga and marksmanship. It calms and centers you and feeds oxygen to the brain. When we’re under stress we tend to hold our breath, so be mindful of that and keep breathing. Also, before your time in the spotlight, take three deep, cleansing breaths.

8. Relax Your Muscles

If you feel your muscles tightening up, do your best to relax them. Unclench your jaw, loosen your hands, maybe do a shoulder roll. An important indicator of tension is when you start speaking from high up in your throat instead of down in your chest. Visualize sending your voice downward where it belongs.

9. Pause When Needed

  If you start to get choked up, simply pause, take a breath and collect yourself.   And don’t compound the stress by stressing out about your stress! Believe me, people understand. In fact, an occasional pause at the big moments can be helpful rhetorically.

10. Don’t Over-apologize

The instinct here is to say “I’m sorry” over and over. You have nothing to apologize for. If you want to say it once, that’s fine, but know that people are pulling for you, and they’re not nearly as worried about it as you are.

Bonus Tip: Avoid it if Necessary!

My friend and presentation expert Patricia Fripp points out that before speaking on an issue that involves you emotionally, it’s always safest to be sure you’ve had time to actually  process  that experience.

That’s a luxury you won’t always have, but when you do, it’s probably best to give yourself some time and space.

And when you don’t, remember to extend that grace you give others to yourself. You’re human, and your humanity is part of what attracts people to you. It’s a strength, not a weakness.

[Photo by Tom Pumford on Unsplash ]

[A version of this post originally appeared in PRSA’s  Strategies & Tactics ]

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How to Give a Speech: 10 Tips for Powerful Public Speaking

how-to-give-a-speech

When we start preparing to give a speech, it can be a nerve-wracking experience. It’s completely normal—most of us feel a combination of excitement and nerves when we’re about to take the stage.

However, with some strategic planning and practical advice, you can make sure your speech is powerful and effective. In this blog post, we’ll explore how to give a speech that will leave your audience engaged and inspired.

We’ll examine 10 tips to help you build a powerful speech, from outlining your points methodically to crafting captivating introductions . Whether you’re a beginner or experienced public speaker, these nuggets of wisdom will help you take your next speech to the next level. Let’s get started!

Quick Review of Key Points

Preparing ahead of time is the key to giving an effective speech. Make sure to structure your speaking points, rehearse your delivery, and be aware of the needs of your audience for maximum impact.

How to Prepare for a Speech

Preparing for a speech is an essential step to public speaking success. It can help to build your confidence, create content that reaches the audience, and reduce performance anxiety.

Although it can be time-consuming in the beginning, preparation will ensure less stress and more comfort during delivery. Here are some tips to consider when preparing for a speech:

Practice : Before delivering a speech, practice it out loud several times. This will allow you to gain experience in speaking without an audience and increase your confidence when you do have one.

Practicing also helps to identify awkward moments in the speech or any difficult phrases which then can be changed or removed altogether. Additionally, it helps you determine where to pause for effect. Research : Depending on the topic of the speech , research should be done beforehand to gather information that is relevant and interesting for the audience. It is important to get acquainted with the language typically used by audiences to ensure a clear understanding of what is being said.

Additionally, relevant statistics and stories concerning the topic are a great way to draw in listeners and make the presentation more engaging .

Know Your Audience : When preparing your speech, be sure to consider who will be listening. For instance, if giving a presentation at work, include industry jargon that members would understand and include relevant topics from publications that might be familiar to the employees.

On the other hand, if consulting business professionals in their field then technical language may be easier for them to comprehend than laypeople or students.

By gathering valuable information about the topic and getting comfortable with a speech’s content and delivery through practice, speakers will gain more assurance during their talk as well as respect from their audience.

Preparing beforehand not only gives insight into how to engage listeners but also encourages more meaningful conversations after the event. Now that we have discussed how to prepare for a speech let us move on to creating an outline which will provide structure during delivery.

Create an Outline

After determining the audience and purpose of your speech, the next step to effective public speaking is to create an outline .

An outline serves as a roadmap to ensure that your speech has a logical flow and contains all important points. It also can help keep you on track during the speech itself, allowing you to stay focused and organized.

When constructing an outline, consider drawing up both a main point and sub-points for each portion of the speech. Both should be relevant to the goal of the presentation and backed up by facts and research.

Brainstorming can help in this process; try grouping your ideas together in clusters to make sure you cover all possible angles.

Furthermore, writing out exact quotations or figures can prove beneficial in forming a cohesive argument. At this stage, it is also wise to decide where transitions, humor, stories, or other engaging techniques will be included.

While there are differing opinions as to whether outlines should be memorized or simply used as a reference while speaking, many agree that they should serve their purpose – not only articulate the main thoughts of the speech but also assist the speaker with maintaining focus and preventing distractions.

The debate between those who advocate for memorization versus casual consulting touches upon issues such as rehearsal time, risk of errors in delivery, ease of practice versus actual performance and more.

Each side has valid arguments that should be weighed prior to deciding what type of approach best suits your needs.

Having a firmly constructed outline acts as a valuable tool when it comes time to deliver a powerful public speech. By actively utilizing this tactic, speakers may not only enhance their clarity and coherence, but also add structure and vibrance to their presentations.

Now that we have explored what goes into crafting an effective outline, let’s dive deeper into how we can best collect resources and research our topics for maximum impact.

Collect Sources and Research

Collecting sources and research is a crucial step for any public speaking engagement. It ensures that you have the necessary information to make strong points and back up your statements.

Before writing your speech, take time to research your topic to gain familiarity with different perspectives, facts, and counterpoints. This will help you to craft an argument that can stand up to scrutiny while also adding a breadth of knowledge to your speech.

Interviews can be a powerful source of evidence and anecdotes, so try to include one or two relevant interviews in your research process. Relying solely on secondary sources such as books and articles can lead to a narrow scope of understanding.

Interviews provide an opportunity to hear directly from an expert and create an interesting dynamic in your speech by adding personal experiences as well as commentary from a professional.

In research it is important to stay objective. Gather a variety of perspectives and be open-minded about their merits. Don’t forget to consider both sides of the argument when researching for your speech.

Doing this allows you to understand the opposing perspective and enables you to anticipate potential counter arguments from your audience.

By acknowledging them beforehand, you may increase the persuasive power of your speech by showing confidence in the points you make.

Once you have collected all sources, review them carefully and separate the most pertinent information from the less useful material.

Synthesising this information into concise yet impactful points is a critical part in delivering powerful talks without overloading your audience with too much data or going off track during your speech delivery.

Organizing Your Speech

Before you start putting your words together, it’s important to consider how the different parts of a speech fit together. By taking the time to organize the ideas in your speech , you’ll be able to deliver a presentation that is well-constructed and easy to understand.

One way to help with organizing your speech is to write an outline . An outline is like a map or plan that will provide you with a framework for each section of your speech.

Start by writing out your main points and then include additional details underneath each one. This will help keep your speech focused and provide direction for where you are going next.

Another approach for organizing your speech is known as the “inverted pyramid” method. This structure starts with your conclusion at the beginning of the speech, and then works backward by providing more explanation and detail as it moves toward the introduction.

This method can be helpful when speaking about topics that are unfamiliar to the audience since it doesn’t require them to wait until near the end of the presentation to learn what you’ve been talking about.

No matter which organization approach you choose, make sure to practice it before giving your speech so that you are comfortable with its flow. Lastly, remember that it’s ok to adjust things while you speak if they don’t seem or feel quite right.

Now let’s take a look at how we can use these organizing techniques to actually put our speeches together – starting with structuring our speech.

Structure Your Speech

Creating a strong structure for your speech will ensure that the audience stays engaged and understands your main points. As you are developing an outline, map out how you want to begin and end your speech.

Break up the information into smaller sections with either verbal or visual cues so that your audience can clearly see how you are transitioning between topics . Consider adding humor judiciously throughout your presentation as this could help engage the audience and lighten any tension.

The length of your presentation is also important. You will want to make sure that you include all of the necessary information without going over time.

Oftentimes less is more; if you can say it in five minutes why use ten? Make sure that you practice timed rehearsals so that you can gauge how long you’re actually speaking.

In contrast, avoid trying to pack too much content into one presentation as this could overwhelm both you and the audience. If needed, offer supplemental reading materials for those who may be interested in delving further into the subject matter.

Paragraphs can also be helpful when organizing large amounts of content within the body of your presentation. Utilizing paragraph breaks gives your audience a break and helps to highlight key ideas or summaries before moving onto a new topic area.

Finally, it is crucial to remember what your desired outcome is from the presentation; plan accordingly by ensuring that the beginning, middle, and end serve their respective purposes and adhere to that goal.

With careful deliberations, structuring a successful presentation can be achieved with relative ease.

Having established a solid structure for your speech, it’s important to focus on another key element: rehearsal. The next section will discuss the benefits of practicing before delivering a powerful public speaking performance.

Rehearse Your Speech

Rehearsing is integral to giving a successful speech. When you rehearse your presentation, you give your mind an opportunity to become familiar with the notes and concepts that you are presenting. It also increases your confidence and reduces anxiety or self-doubt.

In fact, studies have found that those who rehearsed their presentation had higher scores in public speaking performance and language proficiency evaluations.

When it comes to how much rehearsal is enough, opinions are divided. Some people believe that over-rehearsing can lead to a more robotic speech with less natural emotion and connection with the audience .

On the other hand, others argue that no matter how well-versed someone is on the topic, additional rehearsal time improves both the delivery of the speech and memorization of key points and facts.

Ultimately, it’s important to practice until you personally find the most comfortable level for yourself, as this will ultimately result in a more engaging delivery.

Finally, if at all possible, try to practice in front of a friend or colleague for honest feedback on any elements that need improvement before the big day. Rehearsal dedication may be tedious, but it results in big rewards on stage–enabling you to deliver your content with clarity, confidence, and poise.

With thoughtful preparation complete, it’s now time to step into the spotlight and give your speech!

Giving Your Speech

The key to success when giving a speech is to be well prepared and confident. Every individual’s preparation process will vary, but the basics should stay the same.

Start by studying your content, understanding the material and being able to repeat it in your own words. Clarify any potentially difficult points. Create visual aids like PowerPoint slides or handouts that supplement the key ideas in your speech.

Practice your public speaking skills with informal conversations with friends and family or rehearse it alone in front of a mirror. Use visualization; imagine yourself confidently delivering your speech. Consider addressing a practice audience if possible to become more accustomed to a live size group.

On the day of the event, arrive early and plan for any potential obstacles: What if my computer doesn’t work? What if I forget something? Allow sufficient time for setup and check-in.

When you are ready to give your speech, take some deep breaths, focus on the positives, and distract yourself from any anxious thoughts with positive affirmations. Remember you have prepared diligently for this moment, you are well prepared and you will succeed!

Start strong by engaging the audience immediately with an attention grabbing opening statement. Speak clearly and make sure that everyone can hear and understand your message.

Slow down and emphasize points as needed throughout your presentation. Be aware of pace, volume, and tone of voice: too fast/monotone can confuse/bore listeners while pauses add a dramatic effect that keeps their interest piqued.

Ultimately, giving a successful speech will depend on knowing your material well enough to speak confidently in front of your audience without hesitation or missteps.

When you do make a mistake (and they happen!) don’t panic – know that mistakes are inevitable but don’t be discouraged; get back on track as soon as possible and continue at the same energy level you had before the mistake occurred.

Having successfully given your speech, take a moment to reflect on what went well and what could be improved upon for next time before transitioning into the next step: mastering delivery.

Master Your Delivery

Mastering your delivery is the key to an effective speech. Without purposeful body language and careful emphasis on certain words , your speech may lack wow-factor and prevent listeners from tuning in. Following these simple tips can help you get started with delivering an engaging and memorable speech:

The most important part of delivery is practice. Rehearse and perfect your speech ahead of time – this allows for more natural flow and confidence during your presentation. It also helps to create pauses between sentences for clarity, emphasize key points, and not be too casual or stiff.

Practicing inflections and varying tones adds interest to your speech by keeping listeners’ attention.

Additionally, it’s important to project your voic e so everyone in the room can hear you; make sure you’re speaking loud enough but don’t feel pressure to shout or yell at any point unless that’s part of the atmosphere of the event.

It’s also crucial to maintain good posture while speaking – stand tall with both feet on the ground, keep your back straight, hold yourself up without gesturing too much or leaning against a podium if applicable.

To further engage listeners, use purposeful hand gestures as they help emphasize certain points and add visual interest – however, avoid overusing them as it can hinders communication.

Make meaningful eye contact with audience members throughout the presentation – otherwise you might come across as unenthusiastic or bored with what you’re saying which deters attention away from the content itself.

By mastering your delivery, you can boost the impact of your presentation considerably – providing a memorable experience for your audience that stands out from others’. As such, it’s worth investing time into practicing ahead of time until delivery feels comfortable and second nature.

Having said this, making use of visual aids such as PowerPoint slides can greatly improve the impact of a speech once delivery has been mastered – let’s look into that next.

Use Visual Aids

Using visual aids can help presenters express concepts more clearly and engage the audience.

Visuals are particularly useful when conveying complex information, such as data, trends, or statistics — they impart meaning at a glance. But some public speakers may wonder if visual aids can be distracting or unnecessary.

Even though visuals can attract attention away from a presenter’s verbal delivery, carefully designed visuals can actually support the speech and help provide clarity. If done well, visuals are effective for capturing an audience’s interest and helping them to better understand the content being presented.

For example, a graph or chart should relate to the points made in the speech and should be discussed in more detail during its appearance onscreen. The presentation can also include larger images that effectively reinforce the ideas conveyed in the speech.

Videos and sound clips are other powerful forms of multimedia that could be employed to make the speech more meaningful.

To ensure that visuals enhance the message of the presentation, key factors to consider include relevancy to topic, good graphic design or aesthetics, accurate size to prevent distortion or blurriness, and seamless integration into the keynote slides or printed handouts .

In this way, visuals offer an opportunity for presenters to demonstrate their creativity and keep their audiences interested in what is being said. Thus, used wisely and aptly, visuals can add tremendous value to speeches by presenting arguments more efficiently and driving home important points. Now let’s explore effective techniques for speech giving that will allow you to craft and deliver your speeches with confidence.

Effective Techniques for Speech Giving

There are a number of effective techniques for giving a speech that will help you deliver it with confidence and poise.

First, practice your delivery in advance. You should practice both in front of a mirror or recording device to check for any distracting habits such as talking too quickly or mispronouncing words.

Second, use simple, clear language and short, concise sentences. Avoid overly technical terms and jargon that may leave your audience confused.

Third, work to establish a connection with your audience by using appropriate facial expressions and hand gestures while speaking.

Fourth, utilize effective persuasive techniques such as presenting evidence, strong arguments supported by facts, personal anecdotes and vivid metaphors.

Finally, articulate an organized structure for your speech. Your speech should have an introduction, body and conclusion to clearly communicate the main point and provide the audience with the necessary context to understand it better.

While these techniques may sound intimidating at first, they can be learned over time with practice and will make all the difference in how successful your speech delivery is received by your audience.

To build on these skills further , the next section will provide tips on how to build confidence when giving a speech.

Building Confidence

Building confidence is key when giving a powerful speech, as it will enable you to deliver the speech in a more poised and credible manner.

To create this confidence , start by understanding that any hesitation or butterflies prior to your speech are completely normal and should not be feared. Instead, view them as natural states of anticipation for something exciting, knowing that you are about to give an amazing speech.

Next, understanding who your audience is and tailoring your speech to meet their expectations will help build your confidence.

Familiarizing yourself with their interests and knowledge on the subject matter ahead of time can equip you with the understanding needed to respond appropriately if questions arise or objections surface during the speech.

Further, practice is key when building confidence for a public speaking engagement . Rehearsing with friends or colleagues before hand will give you an opportunity to learn where problem areas are within the content of your speech, as well as help solidify your delivery by becoming more comfortable with each step.

Checking sound levels in the room you’re presenting in coupled with learning where exits/emergency locations are located within that space can also help alleviate stress levels and boost self-assurance while delivering the speech.

Finally, wearing comfortable clothing and dressing professionally adds an extra layer of confidence when speaking in public.

If possible, bring an additional outfit on hand during the presentation in case of spills or accidents that would require a quick change between sections of the talk. Having this back-up plan in place can aid in keeping peace of mind at ease throughout the speech.

In conclusion, building confidence prior to a public speaking event can mean the difference between a good and great delivery of your message.

By taking into account each of these tips you can ensure that this part of your preparation runs smoothly and sets you up for success when delivering powerful speeches.

With a well-crafted note card of talking points and strong sense of self-assurance, it’s time to start speaking with passion!

Speaking with Passion

As a public speaker, your audience expects you to engage not only with your words but also with your emotions. To share the most impactful message, it is important to speak passionately about your subject.

Doing so will make your speech more memorable and thereby more effective in convincing your audience of its legitimacy.

The power of speaking authentically with emotion lies in its relatability and connection. Showing feelings allows people to connect with you as a person rather than just a speaker. It opens the door to understanding through empathy and active listening .

Examples might include adding personal stories , telling jokes, or displaying your feelings openly during the delivery of your message.

However, not all topics lend themselves easily to expressing emotion. If the subject matter is overly complex or technical there may be less opportunity for emotional expression—but this doesn’t mean those conversations can’t incorporate emotion.

Even if faced with a difficult situation such as death or financial turmoil, emotions can still be conveyed in a respectful way that keeps audiences engaged.

Remember that how much emotion you show depends on the type of audience you’re sharing it with—using sensitivity when delivering passionate speeches helps avoid awkwardness or embarrassment for any attendees who may find opinionated language uncomfortable for whatever reason.

Striking the right balance between being straightforward and showing compassion takes practice, so take the time to develop a style that works best for you and improves upon each performance.

Finally, incorporating passion into a speech gives it life and makes it relatable and engaging—which are essential elements to speaking effectively.

Having passion means giving ourselves permission to take ownership over our stories, making them deeply personal in order to reach our goals and touch people’s hearts in meaningful ways. With that said, let’s move on to discussing how we should tackle dealing with challenges while giving a speech.

Dealing with Challenges

The process of delivering a speech can be challenging, but it is also rewarding. Difficulties can arise during the process that may threaten to derail your success. To ensure you are adequately prepared for these possible pitfalls it is important to consider strategies for proactively mitigating the risk of encountering these challenges. 1. Public Speaking Anxiety: Many people experience some form of anxiety when asked to speak in public. There are a number of techniques available to combat this fear and increase confidence, such as deep breathing exercises, mental rehearsal, positive self-talk and visualization of success.

Learning about the audience, creating an engaging presentation and using props or visual aids can also help reduce anxiety levels and create a better overall experience for both the speaker and the audience. 2. Unfamiliar Topics or Audiences: When presenting on unfamiliar topics or to an unknown audience it can be difficult to prepare effectively.

In this situation it is important to conduct research on the topic and familiarize yourself with the needs of your audience so that the content is tailored accordingly. It is also helpful to use humor or stories related to the topic in order to engage your audience and make them more receptive to your message. 3. Lack of Support: If you lack support from family, friends, colleagues or mentors, it can be difficult to push through difficult conversations or speeches without any additional motivation.

To overcome this challenge, seek out peer mentorship opportunities or find compatible online communities where people discuss similar topics or objectives. Here you can share ideas, provide feedback and learn from others who have experienced similar issues. 4. Time Constraints: One of the biggest challenges when giving a speech is managing your time effectively in order to deliver an effective message without going over allotted timeslots and boring your audience .

To successfully address this challenge try setting manageable goals for each section of your speech and practice regularly. Replicating real-time conditions as closely as possible will help you stay within time constraints when delivering your speech on the day itself. In conclusion, there are many potential challenges you may face when giving a speech or taking part in a public speaking event – but with proper preparation and practice they are easily managed if approached correctly.

With knowledge of techniques for dealing with such scenarios comes increased confidence when stepping up to the podium – further improving your chances of delivering an effective speech that resonates with your audience members.

Responses to Frequently Asked Questions

How should i end my speech to leave a lasting impression.

The best way to end your speech is by reinforcing your main point and summarizing the key takeaways. You should also encourage the audience to take action, whether it be to sign up for a newsletter, make a donation, or visit your website for more information. This final call to action will not only leave a lasting impression on the audience but will also help you achieve any goals you might have had when making your speech in the first place.

What techniques can I use to keep my audience engaged during my speech?

One of the best techniques for keeping an audience engaged during a speech is to keep it interactive . Ask questions throughout the presentation, as well as allowing for audience input and discussion. This can help to keep people’s attention and create a more engaging experience.

Another great tip is to use humor. Even if you don’t consider yourself a natural comedian, sprinkling in a few jokes here and there can break up the monotony of long speeches and keep people interested. Humor can also help to make points stick in people’s minds, making them easier to remember.

Finally, try to be enthusiastic about the content of your speech. If you show too much indifference or lethargic behavior, it will discourage your audience from paying attention and taking your message seriously.

Instead, be passionate about what you are saying so that the energy of your words carries into the room and engages your audience with excitement.

How can I use storytelling to make my speech more interesting?

Storytelling is a powerful tool that can be used to make any speech more interesting. Telling stories in your speech will help engage the audience and make your message stick. Here are some tips for using storytelling in your speech:

1. Choose stories that are relevant to your message and audience. Think about stories that will best illustrate the point you are trying to convey, or evoke emotions in your listeners. 2. Use vivid descriptions and visuals when telling your story. Be sure to include details such as setting, character descriptions, dialogue and plot points. This will help to bring the story to life for your audience. 3. Make sure the story you are telling has a strong conclusion or moral at the end. This will help add emphasis to your message and make it memorable. 4. Practice telling stories out loud before delivering a speech with them. Rehearsing will help you deliver your story more effectively and with more confidence in front of an audience. By using these tips, storytelling can be an effective tool to make any speech more interesting, engaging, and persuasive!

How can I prepare for my speech effectively?

Preparing for a speech effectively is essential to delivering an impactful and memorable presentation. Here are some tips: 1. Have a clear goal in mind. Before starting to prepare, ask yourself what the purpose of giving the speech is: what message do you want to convey? Defining this will help to structure your content and focus your research. 2. Research thoroughly. Make sure you understand the subject matter well, so that your delivery sounds confident and inspiring. Using facts and data will strengthen your arguments and make your talk more convincing. 3. Outline your speech. Make a rough outline of how you want it to go – from beginning to end – well in advance of the actual presentation. This will give you a strong foundation upon which you can craft an engaging talk with an effective narrative arc that keeps audiences interested and engaged. 4. Practice regularly. Rehearsing your speech out loud several times is key to ensuring that you know it well enough to feel comfortable when delivering it live in front of an audience.

5. Time yourself. Record how long it takes for you to go through your entire speech, so that you can adjust the length as needed before delivering it live – remember that most speeches should last no more than 10-15 minutes. 6. Identify potential questions from the audience and prepare answers before hand. Knowing ahead of time what kind of questions people may ask can help reduce the anxiety of not knowing what comes next, enabling you to stay confident when speaking in public. 7. Work on building up confidence levels before delivering a speech. Visualize yourself succeeding in delivering a great presentation; practice relaxation techniques such as deep breathing or positive self-talk; or use props during practice sessions such as water bottles or stress balls if needed to remain calm during the real thing!

What strategies can I use to reduce my anxiety when giving a speech?

1. Plan Ahead: Create an outline of your speech beforehand and practice it multiple times to become familiar with the content. Doing a trial run with the audience can also help you get used to speaking in front of people.

2. Visualize Success: Positive visualization is a great way to reduce anxiety before giving a speech. Imagine yourself confidently delivering the speech while feeling relaxed and composed.

3. Get Organized: Make sure you have all the materials necessary for your presentation, including notes, slides, etc., to reduce any additional stress that may come from not having what you need when you speak.

4. Take Deep Breaths: Before and during the speech, take a few deep breaths as this will help calm nerves and make sure your breathing is regulated throughout the duration of your presentation.

5. Speak Slowly: It is common to feel anxious while giving a speech and try to rush through it too quickly. Speaking slowly helps maintain composure while delivering your message effectively and clearly.

6. Pay Attention to Your Body: Your posture, stance, movements , facial expressions can all influence how confident you appear to your audience and how nervous you may be feeling inside. Check in with yourself frequently throughout the presentation and correct any tense body language or physical actions if needed.

7. Focus on the Audience: If you notice that your anxiety levels are growing as you present, shift your focus onto the audience instead of yourself as this will help refocus your attention away from negative thoughts that may arise from fear or insecurity.

8. Make Eye Contact: Establishing eye contact with your audience is a key confidence-builder for public speakers—it shows that you’re strong, engaged with them, and receptive to feedback or questions they might have regarding your speech topic .

9. Practice Positive Affirmations: Positive thoughts will boost your self-confidence as well as your mood which can help increase performance quality significantly during speeches or presentations in general—so don’t forget to tell yourself “you can do it!” several times throughout the day leading up to the event!

10. Seek Support of Friends & Family: Many experienced public speakers suggest seeking support of close friends & family members prior and during their speeches—not only does it allow helpful critique regarding content but it also creates a more comfortable atmosphere while speaking which can reduce pre-speech jitters drastically.

how to give a speech without getting emotional

How to Write and Deliver an Encouragement Speech: 13 Practical Tips

  • The Speaker Lab
  • August 18, 2024

Table of Contents

Creating an encouragement speech that resonates and motivates requires more than just a message. It demands an understanding of your audience, the right tone, and impactful delivery.

This post will guide you through crafting speeches that not only uplift but also connect on a personal level. You’ll learn how to weave storytelling into your narrative for greater relatability, choose words that empower, and employ techniques to emotionally engage with listeners. Additionally, we dive into the significance of body language in enhancing your speech’s effectiveness.

We also offer strategies for tailoring your message across different contexts and overcoming common hurdles such as nervousness or lack of engagement. Finally, we stress the importance of feedback in refining your approach to ensure every word counts towards uplifting others.

Crafting Your Encouragement Speech

It’s not just about what you say but how you say it. When it comes to giving an encouragement speech, it’s important to know how to do both.

The Power of Storytelling in Encouragement Speeches

Stories are the heart and soul of any encouragement speech. They transform abstract concepts into relatable experiences. Think back to a time when someone’s personal anecdote lifted your spirits or motivated you to push through a challenge. That’s the power you want to harness. By weaving in stories from your own life or those around you, you create a connection with your audience that facts alone cannot achieve.

To make storytelling effective, focus on moments of overcoming obstacles or achieving something against the odds. Narratives like these illustrate resilience and possibility.

Language and Word Choice

The words we choose can build up or tear down. In crafting your encouragement speech, opt for language that empowers and uplifts. Phrases like “you can,” “you will,” and “believe in yourself” aren’t clichés—they’re battle cries for those needing a boost.

Avoid negativities even when discussing challenges. Instead, frame these challenges as opportunities rather than roadblocks. This approach doesn’t deny difficulties but reframes them as part of the journey toward success.

Techniques for Emotional Engagement

Rhetorical devices such as repetition emphasize key points while questions prompt self-reflection among listeners. Use these tools sparingly but effectively to punctuate crucial ideas within your message. Such techniques not only grab attention but also ensure they linger long after you’ve concluded speaking. Tamsen Webster , for instance, details strategies speakers can use to maintain engagement throughout their presentation.

Varying tone, pitch, and pace help convey passion which is contagious. Your enthusiasm becomes theirs, motivating action beyond mere contemplation.

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Think about the last time a story really grabbed you. It wasn’t just the words, but how they made you feel, right? That’s the magic we’re aiming for in encouragement speeches.

Why Stories Work Wonders

We’ve all been there—sitting through a speech that feels more like a lecture than an inspiring talk. But then comes a story, and suddenly everyone perks up. Why? Because stories are relatable. They let us see ourselves in others’ shoes, making their victories feel possible for us too.

This isn’t just fluff; it’s backed by science. When we hear stories, our brains light up—not only processing language but also feeling emotions and visualizing scenes. This makes messages stick with us longer and encourages action.

Making It Personal

To harness this power in your speeches, start with personal anecdotes. Your own journey can be incredibly powerful because it’s authentic—you lived it. Share challenges you’ve faced and how you overcame them to inspire your audience to do the same.

But remember: authenticity is key here. If your story doesn’t ring true or seems exaggerated, it loses its impact and—worse yet—it could damage trust with your audience.

Finding Universal Themes

Your personal anecdote might not resonate with everyone on every level—that’s okay. The goal is to find universal themes within your story that anyone can connect with: perseverance against odds; finding joy amidst struggles; embracing change as growth opportunities. These themes speak to shared human experiences and create deeper connections between speaker and listener.

Language and Word Choice in an Encouragement Speech

The words you pick in your encouragement speech can make or break the impact. It’s important to choose just the right words so that you can leave your audience energized and inspired.

Empowering Your Audience with Positive Language

Selecting positive, empowering language is crucial. Words have power—they can lift people up or weigh them down. To motivate someone, use language that sparks hope and enthusiasm. Instead of saying “Don’t give up,” try “Keep pushing forward.” It’s about framing challenges as opportunities rather than obstacles.

This approach not only helps listeners see the glass half full but also encourages them to take action towards their goals. A study by the University of Pennsylvania showed that positive language significantly influences motivation levels in individuals facing challenges.

Rhetorical Devices: The Secret Sauce

To really connect with your audience, sprinkle some rhetorical devices into your speech like metaphors or analogies. They help simplify complex ideas and make messages stick.

Anaphora—the repetition of a word at the beginning of successive clauses—can be particularly powerful when used sparingly for emphasis on key points during your speech. Consider how Martin Luther King, Jr.’s famous “I Have a Dream” speech uses anaphora to unforgettable effect.

Emotion is the secret sauce that makes messages stick. But how do you bottle this elusive ingredient in your encouragement speeches? Let’s explore some tried and true techniques.

To hit the emotional chord, understanding your audience is key. Are they seeking motivation, comfort, or a rally to action? This insight shapes everything from your tone to your stories. Start by setting a clear goal for what emotion you want to evoke—be it hope, courage, or determination.

Tone matters more than you think. It’s not just what you say; it’s how you say it. A warm and sincere tone can turn even simple words into powerful motivational tools.

The structure of your message also plays a crucial role in its impact. Begin with an attention-grabbing opening that speaks directly to the heart of the audience’s concerns or aspirations before leading them on a journey towards empowerment and resolution.

Stories are empathy machines—they let us walk in another’s shoes without taking off our own. Integrating personal anecdotes makes your speech relatable and memorable because we’re hardwired to remember stories better than facts alone. As we at The Speaker Lab know, a  well-chosen story acts as an emotional anchor that listeners can hold onto long after they’ve forgotten other parts of your speech.

Selecting empowering language injects energy into your encouragement speech like nothing else. Words have power so choose those that inspire resilience and confidence. Avoid negative phrasing that might deflate spirits. Instead, opt for positive affirmations that uplift and motivate.

The Role of Body Language in Your Encouragement Speech

When it comes to delivering an encouragement speech, the words you choose are crucial. But there’s another player in the game that often flies under the radar: body language . This silent partner can make or break your connection with the audience.

Non-Verbal Cues Speak Volumes

Your posture, gestures, and facial expressions do a lot more than just add flair to your delivery. They’re key components of how audiences interpret your message. Standing tall conveys confidence, while maintaining eye contact builds trust. On the other hand, crossed arms might suggest you’re closed off or defensive—even if that’s not what you feel.

A smile can be a powerful tool as well . It not only makes you appear more approachable but also has been shown to positively affect listener perception, making them more receptive to your message.

Mirroring for Connection

Mirroring—the subtle art of matching someone else’s body language—can create a sense of empathy and understanding between speaker and listener. When done correctly during an encouragement speech, mirror neurons fire up, letting your audience know “I’m with you.”

This doesn’t mean mimicking every move someone makes—that would be weird. Instead, focus on capturing the general vibe of their energy level and enthusiasm through similar gestures and vocal tones.

Cultural Sensitivity Is Key

Different cultures have different norms when it comes to non-verbal communication. What’s considered respectful eye contact in one culture may be seen as challenging or rude in another. Educating yourself about these differences is essential for ensuring your message is received as intended across diverse groups. Becoming aware of cultural variations not only helps avoid misunderstandings but also strengthens global connections—one gesture at a time.

Tailoring Encouragement Speeches for Different Contexts

When you’re tasked with giving an encouragement speech, the setting can range from a high-stakes corporate boardroom to a lively sports team locker room. The secret sauce? Knowing how to adapt your message to fit these diverse environments seamlessly.

Crafting a Unique Encouragement Speech

First off, understanding your audience is crucial. A pep talk for a sales team chasing their quarterly targets will differ vastly from motivating volunteers at a charity event. It’s about hitting the right notes that resonate with your listeners’ current experiences and aspirations.

Setting the tone comes next. For instance, in a corporate environment, weaving in success stories relevant to business growth can inspire action. Contrast this with addressing athletes where tales of resilience and teamwork often strike deeper chords.

The structure of your message also needs careful consideration. An effective approach might involve starting with acknowledging challenges faced by the audience, followed by inspirational anecdotes or data supporting why they can overcome these hurdles, and concluding with a clear call-to-action.

Using Specially Tailored Stories

Incorporating personal stories or anecdotes not only makes your speech relatable but also memorable. This technique proves especially powerful when adapted correctly for different contexts—whether it’s sharing success stories within similar industries during corporate talks or highlighting individual achievements in sports team pep talks.

Overcoming Common Challenges

Nervousness, authenticity, and keeping the audience engaged are big hurdles in delivering an encouragement speech. But they’re not insurmountable! Here’s how you can leap over these obstacles with grace.

Dealing with Nervousness

Facing a sea of faces can make your palms sweat and heart race. Remember, it’s okay to be nervous; it means you care about delivering value to your audience. One way to ease those jitters is by practicing your speech multiple times beforehand. You might also try deep breathing exercises or visualization techniques to calm down right before taking the stage.

Another trick is to focus on why you’re there—to help and inspire others. This mindset shift can reduce pressure because you’re not focusing solely on yourself anymore.

Ensuring Authenticity

Your audience can spot a fake from miles away, so don’t even think about being someone you’re not up there. Sharing personal stories or anecdotes that connect with the core message of your speech makes you more relatable and trustworthy.

If sharing doesn’t come naturally, start small by incorporating bits of personal experiences relevant to your topic until it feels more comfortable for you.

Maintaining Audience Engagement

To keep everyone hanging onto every word, use dynamic language and involve them through questions or callouts if possible. This approach turns passive listeners into active participants.

Varying your tone and pace throughout also helps maintain interest. It’s like adding different spices as you cook; too much of one thing gets boring quickly.

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Incorporating Feedback for Improvement

In some cases it’s possible to get feedback on one’s encouragement speech. Should the opportunity present itself to you, take it. Not matter their expertise, speakers can always use audience reactions and critiques to refine their speeches. But where do you start? Let’s dive into the specifics.

The Power of Constructive Criticism

First off, embracing constructive criticism is key. It might sting at first, but think of it as an investment in your future performances. Ask fellow speakers or mentors who have been in the trenches what they think. Their insights can be goldmines for improvement.

Moreover, consider anonymous surveys from your audience. Tools like SurveyMonkey let you gather honest opinions without putting anyone on the spot.

Use Feedback to Improve Your Encouragement Speech

Now that you’ve gathered all this valuable feedback, what next? Start by identifying common themes—these are areas needing immediate attention. If multiple people point out that your opening lacks punch or your message gets lost mid-way, there’s a pattern emerging that needs fixing.

Create a plan of action for each piece of consistent feedback received. If it’s about improving engagement, research techniques used by successful speakers to keep audiences hooked from start to finish.

Remember: improvement doesn’t happen overnight. Practice these adjustments during smaller gatherings before taking them onto bigger stages again.

Evaluating Progress Over Time

To really measure how far you’ve come, set specific goals directly related to some of the critiques you originally received. After subsequent speaking engagements, reassess using the same criteria. This continuous loop ensures not just temporary fixes but long term growth in your speaking skills.

FAQs on Encouragement Speeches

How do you motivate someone in a speech.

Connect deeply, share stories that resonate, and show them the path from where they are to where they could be.

What is the best motivational speech of all time?

The “I Have A Dream” by Martin Luther King, Jr. stands out for its powerful vision and timeless call to action.

What is a positive motivation speech?

A talk that uplifts spirits, sparks hope, and encourages folks to chase their dreams with relentless optimism.

What should I say in a motivational speech?

Talk about overcoming obstacles and taking concrete steps towards achieving one’s goals. Make it personal and inspiring.

Giving an encouragement speech is about connecting, inspiring, and moving your audience to action. To engage your audience, try telling stories that make your message stick. As for the words you use, choose positive phrasing and aim to uplift with every sentence. Non-verbal cues are your silent cheerleaders; use them wisely to add depth beyond words.

Tailor your message to match your audience. After all, context matters as much as content. Tweak your speech to touch hearts in any setting.

Nervous? Everyone is at first. Authenticity beats anxiety every time, so be real, be you. Feedback will fuel your growth, so listen, learn, then lead stronger than before. Improvement never stops in crafting a compelling encouragement speech that truly transforms lives.

  • Last Updated: August 7, 2024

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how to give a speech without getting emotional

06-15-2016 WORK LIFE

Five Ways To Speak Passionately Without Getting Too Emotional

Showing emotion can be a good thing, but you still want to come across as focused, not frazzled.

Five Ways To Speak Passionately Without Getting Too Emotional

Songwriter Lin-Manuel Miranda accepts the award for Best Book of A Musical for his work in Hamilton onstage during the 70th Annual Tony Awards.

BY  Anett Grant 3 minute read

Good speakers are passionate–and it shows. Bad speakers are dull, plodding, humdrum. There’s no sense that they’re animated by their material. And it’s true–showing that you truly care about a subject can go a long way toward winning over your listeners.

But passion in speaking is like spice in cooking. If you’ve ever added cayenne pepper to a dish, you know you need to be careful to use just the right amount. Too much emotion in your speaking is like dumping in a whole tablespoon of hot pepper–it’ll be the only thing anyone will notice, and they won’t want to finish.

These are the five ingredients of effective, passionate communication that doesn’t wind up sounding overly emotional.

1. Feeling That Doesn’t Kill The Content

When you speak with passion, your message has vibrancy and color. Passion brings your message to life by showing that you’re fully invested in what you’re talking about–your feelings about your subject are on full display. But if you’re too passionate, that feeling will overpower the content.

Your audience gets blinded by the intensity of your emotions and loses focus on what you’re actually saying, thinking, “What exactly was her message again?” You have to find the balance between feeling and purpose. Make sure your emotions enliven your subject but don’t supersede it.

2. Deliberate Movements

When you add passion to your speaking, you engage your audience with your movement. Whether you’re using gestures or walking around during your presentation, you have to move mindfully in order to avoid distracting your audience. Taking a well-timed step toward your audience or a strong hand gesture can add impact.

But when you’re too emotional, your movements often come in flurries of hand-waving or continuous pacing–movements that aren’t connected to your message in a meaningful way. You may not even notice you’re doing that, but your audience will. Your behavior can seem jerky, random, and repetitive. You become so caught up in your feelings that you may not even realize that you’re moving. Remember, you want to come across as focused, not frazzled.

3. A Powerful (But Not Overpowering) Voice

Passionate speakers’ voices capture their audience’s attention. They’re clear and commanding. But power does not mean high volume–you can be a passionate speaker with a quiet intensity to your voice. You can also use contrast in order to highlight points of passion without overwhelming your audience: Change your tone or emphasis at key places in your talk, then fall back into a more relaxed voice later. When you’re too emotional, your voice becomes sharp, and you end up shouting at your audience. They’ll hear you, but they won’t be listening.

4. Dimensionality

Incorporate peaks and valleys into the way you communicate. You can build crescendos by telling compelling stories and using rhythm, then you can drop down to consolidate meaning and prepare for your next point. This isn’t strictly about tone of voice–it’s about structure. But that will impact the way you sound.

This mix of passion and substance will keep your audience engaged. But when you’re too emotional, you tend to stay at the same level of high-pitched excitement, without changing pace or tone. Stay at this level too long, and you’ll exhaust your audience and lose their attention. A passionate speaker is like a talented DJ who’s fully immersed in the music but knows when to mix things up.

When speaking passionately, your points still need to flow logically from one to the next, always making sure to emphasize the main idea you want to get across. You’re not overly formal, but you still get to the point. If you go overboard with emotion, you get into stream-of-consciousness thinking. You go off on tangents–even tangents of tangents. Your audience stops following you, and everyone gets lost. It’s as if you’re lost on a long hike in the middle of the woods. You forget how you got there, and you don’t know where to go next.

Passion is great, but too much can derail an otherwise solid presentation. By recognizing the differences between being passionate and being too emotional, you can find the right balance inspire your audience, not stress them out.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Anett Grant is the CEO of Executive Speaking, Inc. and the author of multiple e-books on speaking. Read her latest e-book here   More

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Alice Boyes Ph.D.

How to Shake Off a Hurtful Comment

Practical strategies to bounce back when you get your feelings hurt..

Posted March 24, 2021 | Reviewed by Gary Drevitch

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Key Points:

  • Hurtful comments from family, friends, or coworkers, even if they were not spoken with malice, can lead to rumination or a triggering of one's anxieties.
  • Research suggests ways to move past such comments without experiencing anger or jettisoning a relationship, such as adopting practices of self-compassion and avoiding self-blame.
  • One can also sit with the comment for a period of time, and evaluate later whether it remains troubling or whether the pain or anger lingers.

Offhand comments from friends, family, and colleagues, or even strangers, can be hurtful for a myriad of reasons. Here are some common examples.

  • You get advice when you were looking for support.
  • You get toxic positivity , e.g., you're told "keep the faith and it will happen" when you have no guarantee of success.
  • Someone expresses how easily they do something you find difficult.
  • Someone "one-ups" you , e.g., tells you they just bought a vacation house when you tell them you're looking at buying your first home.
  • Someone treats flippantly something you put a lot of effort into, e.g., a craft project.
  • Folks pry about a personal and sensitive topic.
  • You try to be supportive and the person takes it the wrong way.

When you have these experiences, the hurt can sting and cause rumination, which is when you repeatedly replay a conversation or event. Hurtful comments from the past can also get easily re-triggered. This can reach a point that you feel angry when you have any interaction with that person and/or want to avoid them.

Here are some practical tips for bouncing back when you've got hurt feelings.

Luis Galvez/Unsplash

1. Are you personalizing it?

Take this scenario: Someone encourages you to stay positive and implies it will affect your outcomes when logically it won't. You think, "They should know me better and that I'm a worrier."

It's easy to think that the person doesn't care about you because they're not adapting their love/support language to who you are. Most likely, they only have one style and don't have another one in their repertoire. They never learned a different way. Society does a terrible job of teaching people how to give effective emotional support.

If you don't add personalizing, a comment may still hurt, but less.

2. Acknowledge your anger and hurt together.

Many comments that trigger hurt also trigger anger. To cope in a healthy way, acknowledge both these emotions together. Literally say to yourself, "I feel hurt and angry...."

Acknowledging your specific, precise emotions is the first step of self-compassion.

Acknowledging your anger can help you not personalize the comment. Anger makes us want to fight and hurt makes us want to cower in a corner. Acknowledging both feelings can balance these reactions.

3. Acknowledge what a common experience hurt feelings are.

It's easy to chastise yourself for having hurt feelings. You might say to yourself, "I shouldn't be so sensitive" or "I shouldn't be so needy."

The types of hurts humans experience are universal. I can virtually guarantee that everyone reading this article will have experienced all the examples laid out at the beginning. You probably have vivid memories of each one.

Humans have evolved to be exquisitely sensitive to subtle cues to social acceptance and rejection because of how essential being in a tribe has historically been to our survival. Getting your feelings hurt easily isn't because you're too sensitive or needy. In fact, it's because having a sensitive trigger for this is adaptive, even though that feels unpleasant.

When you acknowledge these are common experiences, it can help you feel less lonely. Again, it won't take the hurt away, but if you don't add loneliness to your feelings of hurt and anger, it'll take the edge off.

Acknowledging common human experiences is another essential component of self-compassion.

4. Remove any other self-inflicted victim-blaming.

Thinking "I'm too sensitive" is self-inflicted victim-blaming. There are other forms of this, too. You might think, "I'm a weirdo for not finding positivity helpful" or "I'm a weirdo for taking this so seriously" (e.g., if you put a lot of effort into something that isn't appreciated.)

how to give a speech without getting emotional

"Good vibes only" is a culturally prescribed coping style, especially in the United States. But there are many people who find it draining and not helpful. Likewise, putting in effort is to be commended, not ridiculed.

5. Acknowledge the potential impact of the comment on your behavior and make a game plan.

Let's say you've been exercising your way to weight loss. You get a snippy comment that makes you feel like binge eating. Admit that out loud to yourself — literally say it aloud — and make a plan.

A good plan is often to stick with your existing game plan and see if the hurt from the comment, and any urges the comment has driven, dissipate after a day or two. You can say, "I'm going to choose not to binge today and go for my run. I'll reassess in two days." You might find that the hurt remains but the urge to binge in response has gone down.

Hurt feelings are common but we often don't think explicitly about strategies for coping. Try these suggestions out and find what works for you.

Alice Boyes Ph.D.

Alice Boyes, Ph.D., translates principles from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and social psychology into tips people can use in their everyday lives.

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To Overcome Your Fear of Public Speaking, Stop Thinking About Yourself

  • Sarah Gershman

how to give a speech without getting emotional

Tips for before and during your presentation.

Even the most confident speakers find ways to distance themselves from their audience. It’s how our brains are programmed, so how can we overcome it? Human generosity. The key to calming the amygdala and disarming our panic button is to turn the focus away from ourselves — away from whether we will mess up or whether the audience will like us — and toward helping the audience. Showing kindness and generosity to others has been shown to activate the vagus nerve, which has the power to calm the fight-or-flight response. When we are kind to others, we tend to feel calmer and less stressed. The same principle applies in speaking. When we approach speaking with a spirit of generosity, we counteract the sensation of being under attack and we feel less nervous.

Most of us — even those at the top — struggle with public-speaking anxiety. When I ask my clients what makes them nervous, invariably they respond with the same answers:

how to give a speech without getting emotional

  • Sarah Gershman is an executive speech coach and CEO of Green Room Speakers. She is a professor at the McDonough School of Business at Georgetown University, where she teaches public speaking to leaders from around the globe.

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Giving a speech

It's the season of speeches.

Every four years, Americans are treated to oratory by speakers of both parties who address their national party conventions. The purpose of such oratory is less to persuade than to fire up the attendees who will sally forth from their respective conventions determined to mobilize forces for their candidates up and down the ballot.

Some of the speeches are downright scary, while others are joyous and uplifting. Regardless, the focus on so many speeches in such a condensed period of time emphasizes the power of the spoken word.

As a former speechwriter turned executive coach, I have helped many women and men hone their messages. I want to share a few things I have learned, mainly through trial and error.

Know your audience. People want to hear what you say, but you need to do your homework before you can connect. Understand what the audience expects of you and tailor your remarks to resonate with their needs.

Acknowledge your limitations. Many times, what a leader has to say is what they must say. That is, the situation is challenging and presents problems. A leader can only accomplish so much. Failure to acknowledge what you can do and what the organization must do is asking for trouble. People will simply tune out.

Address objections. Everyone wants to give an uplifting speech that resonates with harmony and joy. Unfortunately, life is not like that. Leaders need to paint a realistic picture, citing the pluses and minuses. What the leader must do may conflict with what the organization wants to do. It is the leader's responsibility to be honest about the decisions and set the course forward.

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Tell stories. Reveal yourself through stories. Cite examples of individuals in organizations who are making positive contributions. No leader succeeds alone. Every leader needs the team's buy-in. So, make that clear.

Issue the call to action. Not every speech may need a formal call to action, but every public utterance needs to be understood as a call for unity, a coming together to achieve the mission. However, if there is a call to action, learn from the politicians—ask for their support. Simultaneously, include your commitment to supporting the individuals and teams that make up the organization.

Uplift your audience

Knowing, acknowledging, addressing and challenging are just the basics of speechmaking. Each speaker must craft a message that reveals who they are and what they want to accomplish. Give people a reason to believe in you because you believe in them.

One thing I have yet to emphasize in this little essay is delivery. So let me quote the legendary film director, John Ford , “You can speak well if your tongue can deliver the message of your heart.” In short, relax. If you have a good message, speak directly. Show people how you feel with the words you deliver. Doing so will encourage listeners to have faith in you and your leadership.

So often, it is said that a leader's job is to elevate followers and enable them to do their best. If that is the case, a good speech—well-honed or off-the-cuff remarks—is an excellent way to begin the uplifting process.

John Baldoni

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Don't Cry, and 3 Other Rules for Delivering a Passionate Speech People Will Listen To

Delivering a speech on an emotional topic isn't easy, but can be done. here's how to do it well..

Political protest. Public demonstration.

There are times when one small speech can send a ripple through society; when someone is able to tame their emotions and find the perfect words to deliver a message that most people couldn't articulate.

This honor used to belong only to political leaders or high profile figures. Today, more people are feeling compelled to speak out and with a video camera in so many pockets, the stages are endless.

The challenge is, especially when it comes to topics you're passionate about, sometimes the emotions are overwhelming and ultimately inhibit an otherwise great speech. Should the opportunity ever arise for you to deliver a speech about your passion, regardless of what that is, it's important to get your point across with emotion and enthusiasm without getting carried away and risk the message getting lost in the process.

Here are four simple rules for keeping your cool during a hot topic presentation.

Stick to a format that works for you.

When Halsey took to the stage for the Women's March in 2018, she did not hold back. But as she said at the top of her speech, she's most comfortable "I don't really know how to do a speech unless it rhymes." So she delivered the entire speech as a loose rhyme that flowed and told powerful and painful stories about herself and her friends experiencing assault. She used her voice in the best way she knew how.

So whether you want to rhyme, use a PowerPoint , or read your entire speech, do what makes you most comfortable on stage. You'll feel confident in your abilities and won't feel like you're trying to force yourself to fit into one particular mold.

Use the power of repetition.

There are a hundred things I could say about the bravery and power of the teenagers who survived the school shooting in Parkland, Florida and who are now speaking out about gun control. But when Emma Gonzalez gave a speech at a rally , she stood out as a force to be reckoned with.

She spoke about the importance of gun control and the necessity of changes to the law. Her entire speech was emotional and gut-wrenching. Toward the end, she called out some specific behaviors and beliefs held by politicians that she did not agree with, yelling, "We call BS!" after each statement. Soon, the audience joined in and it was a breathtaking moment that won't soon be forgotten.

This exact phrasing might not work for your situation, but repetition and call outs has long been a powerful technique in speech. You can use repetition to make specific points about really stand out to your audience.

Tell them why it matters to you.

Oprah Winfrey was awarded the Cecille B. de Mille award at the 2018 Golden Globes and her acceptance speech did not disappoint. Oprah used the power of story to talk about the importance of recognizing people of color in the entertainment industry, about the power of speaking your truth, and about the importance of women speaking up as a result of the #metoo movement.

She talked about herself as a child seeing Sidney Poitier being honored as the first black man to win an Oscar for Best Actor and how it was the first time she'd seen a black man being celebrated in such a public forum. She told the story of Reecey Taylor, a black woman whose attackers were never brought to justice. Oprah wove story throughout her speech as a powerful example of just why what she was saying was so important.

Try not to cry.

When you're speaking about something you're passionate about or is very personal to you, your emotions will be very close to the surface. That emotion will make your speech powerful, but you should try not to cry .

Sheryl Sandberg's speech at Virginia Tech's 2017 commencement is a great example of a motivational, personal, and powerful speech. She spoke about the death of her husband and had a powerful impact on the audience, but maintained her poise.   

You're passionate about this topic because it's impacted your life in some way. Tell your audience why. Share your personal story as a way to illustrate why it's so important that they listen up.

If you have a message you feel compelled to deliver, keep your emotions in check and let the presentation speak for itself.

A refreshed look at leadership from the desk of CEO and chief content officer Stephanie Mehta

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Big Girls Won’t Cry: Ten Tips to Avert Tears when Speaking in Public

Many clients—particularly female clients—have told me they will do almost anything to avoid speaking at  social gatherings, such as weddings, special birthdays, or memorial services, because they fear they will burst into tears during their speeches.

Many brides truly wish to express their joy and gratitude at their weddings, but are terrified to do so lest their emotions “betray” them. What is often described as stage fright is really a fear of choking up or being embarrassed.  But I always encourage brides to seize the opportunity to share their thoughts and feelings at this usually once-in-a-lifetime occasion, because all the most important people in their lives are gathered together at that moment.  When will they be offered another such chance?

Why can emotion clog the throat of even the most experienced speaker?  And what can be done to avoid it?  How can you handle it gracefully?

Being prepared ahead of time with lots of tactics to control the waterworks will give you confidence;  so don’t shy away from speaking at an important occasion because you fear emotion will overtake you.  Here are some suggestions to get you started:

  • Professor Ad Vingerhoets at Tilburg University is an expert on emotional tears. He believes self-inflicted physical pain can distract you from emotional pain long enough to stop you from crying. What to do?  Pinch the bridge of your nose, where the tear ducts are, or pinch the webbed piece of skin between your thumb and second finger.

DISCLAIMER:  I’ve never actually done this myself because I’ve never felt totally out of control, nor do I easily inflict pain on myself….And the nose thing can be  a bit of a give-away, but hey!  Lots of experts say this works very well!

  • Professor Vingerhoets also suggests, for those of us who are pain-averse, that increasing muscle tension and moving may also limit the crying response, because crying is a passive and helpless reaction. The opposite of feeling helpless is feeling in control, and you can manufacture that feeling by tensing your muscles.
  • Others are in the habit of tilting their heads up slightly so that the tears cannot flow down. Personally, I can’t see this working well for someone whose tears have already started, though it may do the trick if you are just starting to feel your eyes well.
  • Since we’re discussing the eye area, there are a number opportunities here, and one may work for you. You can stare into the middle distance (though not for long, or you will disengage with the audience) Or….
  • Hold your eyes open wide and don’t blink very often. This suggestion is based on the theory that is it easier to keep the tears from starting than it is to stop them after they begin to fall. (try not to look too weird when you do this!)
  • Raise your eyebrows as high as they can go; this can make it easier to hold back tears.
  • Cross your eyes or roll them several times. No kidding!  You may want to only do this when no one is close enough to see you, (often the case when you are behind a podium—however, if the speech is being videotaped, you may be in trouble!) Aside from mentally distracting yourself, crossing one’s eyes apparently also physically keeps the tears from forming.
  • Close your eyes. This will give you a moment to focus on what is happening. Pair that with several deep breaths and you may be able to calm yourself down and focus on not crying.
  • While not moving your head, look up with your eyes. It is almost impossible to cry when you do this.

I’m going to switch gears here.  I have other physical blocks to suggest, but I’m going to reserve them for next week’s post, because my last tip is probably the most important and the most effective:

  • Practice, practice, practice ! When your speech is written out and you rehearse it, you say aloud many, many times those lines that you predict will evoke tears.  Saying it over and over—out loud and possibly in front of a mirror– will drain some of the emotion out of the thought or memory.  If you do it enough times, those words become…just words.  Once you can say it without your throat closing up and your eyes filling, you can start to put some of the emotion back into your delivery.  The difference is that you are now in control, and the emotion is much easier to manage.

Try it!  And don’t dismiss an opportunity to speak in public because you don’t trust yourself….

Please visit the blog next week for more tips on delivering your speech without tears, and share any special tricks of your own that you  may have up your sleeve!

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Practical Media Training and Public Speaking Tips

What To Do When You Get Emotional During A Speech

Many of our clients have to discuss difficult topics during their media interviews and speeches.

For example, I work with more than 100 burn survivors each year. They have a story to tell – but telling their stories about barely escaping a house fire or surviving brutal domestic abuse isn’t easy.

Another client, a zookeeper, could barely contain her grief when discussing the death of one of her beloved animals. Another recent client chose virtual schooling for her children and got upset when asked whether her neighbors thought her decision was strange. It’s no wonder she got emotional – few things will make people more defensive than having their choices as parents questioned by outsiders.

So what should you do when you find yourself getting emotional during a speech or media interview?

101 Ways to Open a Speech Start at Beginning Clickable

1. Ask Yourself Whether It’s Okay To Be Emotional

Most audiences understand why a burn survivor might get emotional when discussing his or her injury. Exhibiting emotion may feel uncomfortable, but in some cases, it may actually enhance your delivery. So don’t automatically try to squelch your emotion just because you’re embarrassed by it. Context matters. When a loving mother, a caring zookeeper, or a disabled burn survivor cries when telling their story, the public tends to understand and empathize. When House Speaker John Boehner cries (as he does regularly), well, that’s a different story.

2. Take a Moment

If you get choked up for a moment, stop talking for a few seconds instead of rushing through your remarks – just put your head down and pause for a few seconds, then look up and continue when you’re ready. If you’re more than just momentarily choked up and fear you may not be able to continue at all, you may need to move on to the next option.

3. De-Personalize and Detach

When people get emotional during a talk, it’s usually because they’re too close to the material. By de-personalizing their stories, they’re often able to get through the material much more easily. For example, the mother might have said:

“I know that some people think virtual home schooling is strange, but I love my kids (begins to choke up) and other people have no right to judge me (begins to tremble and sob). You know (begins to de-personalize), it’s not just about me and my choice. Thousands of parents in our state have decided to pursue virtual schooling for their children, and there are several good reasons for that, such as….”

When emotional speakers make their content less concrete and more abstract, they can often proceed without emotion getting in their way. And once they’re on more solid ground, they can return to the more emotional parts of their story – if and when they’re ready.

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Comments (6)

I also find that over-preparing can help when you know it’s going to be an emotional speech. Before speaking at my sister’s wedding, I gave the speech out loud in my car every morning for weeks so when the big day came around, I was a bit desensitized myself, so the emotional content didn’t choke me up as much. There were a few tears in the car those mornings, though!

Great suggestion, Jessie! Thanks for leaving it on the blog (and congratulations on having a new brother-in-law)! 🙂 Brad

In line with #2, simply breathe. When taking a break from emotional info, some folks will hold their breath, waiting for the uncomfortable moment of praying to God you don’t lose your cool in public. The longer you hold your breath, the harder it is to get your head on. Focusing on the simple in and out of breathing is soothing!

Good advice, JC. Thanks for commenting!

Thanx really helped

Good advices. Emotion and passion can be the best things for a speech. Thank you for posting!

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Emotion in Public Speaking: Why It Matters

If you're in the business of giving presentations, you're in the business of delivering emotion.

Every actor who has ever performed has understood this, as has every great speaker. To succeed in your own talks and presentations, you should understand it too. The good news is that this dynamic is an easy one to grasp and implement.

Want to combine your important content with a great performance? To speak with maximum impact and influence, download my  free Insights article,   "Great Speaking? It's About Performance Over Content!"

Emotion in Action

To illustrate how emotion works in performance, I'd like to use an unlikely example. It's from a recent TED talk which would seem at first to offer little in the way of an emotional connection. The talk is by Hugh Herr, and it's entitled "The New Bionics that Let Us Run, Climb, and Dance." Herr, a double amputee, discusses work he's doing as the head of the M.I.T. Media Lab’s Biomechatronics group.

As you might imagine, the lecture is highly technical. But as the TED description states, it is also "deeply personal," due to Herr's own story of legs lost to frostbite, and also because of that last word in the talk's title: "Dance." To illustrate how advanced and miraculous bionic limb replacement can be, at the end of his talk Herr brings on stage Adrianne Haslet-Davis, who lost her left leg in the 2013 Boston Marathon bombing. Haslet-Davis was—and is—a ballroom dancer, and she performs with a partner once more for the first time on the TED stage. 

The emotional one-two punch provided by this woman's remarkable story, and her flowingly beautiful performance, is an excellent example of how strongly a performer can connect with an audience. Haslet-Davis herself breaks into tears near the dance's end.

Watch the TED talk—and the dance.

Emotions Can Transcend Content

This TED talk is a good example of another aspect of emotion and public speaking: the predictable way an audience's response can transcend subject matter. Always when we speak, the human element is present and operating powerfully, sometimes apart from what we actually say. The dry subject matter we're speaking about is always only part of the equation of Speaker + Topic = Influence.

With the clients I work with, I sometimes use this example: Imagine an esoteric topic; say, an astronomer speaking at a conference about non-planetary rings around asteroids (a topic that happened to be in the news this past week). To all of us non-astronomers, the subject would probably hold little interest. But the audience members at this conference would be just as  passionate  about new discoveries in their field as the speaker! So emotion is very much present and operating in this talk just like any other—and in a way that may transcend bare content.

Emotions Work Even if the Speaker Isn't Emotional

Apart from the highly technical nature of Hugh Herr's "New Bionics" talk, Herr himself isn't an emotional speaker. His uninflected and generally expressionless vocal delivery could have been a challenge to an audience's attentiveness, though his eye contact and physical inclusion of all sides of his audience are excellent.

(To achieve an actively interested audience in your own presentations, learn  how to use your voice and body language when you speak .)

Yet we pay close attention to him! And as we've seen, we're hit with a freight train of emotion at the end of the talk.

Why do we stay attentive? Because the topic has interest for us all, I believe for two reasons. We can all contemplate how we ourselves would be challenged by the loss of a single or both limbs. And we have all shared in the trauma and horror of the victims of the Boston Marathon bombing.

Clearly, the way you develop your message and tap into emotional reservoirs has importance to your audience's emotional experience. The means by which you can achieve that emotional payoff is the subject of my next blog.

You should follow me on Twitter  here .

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How to Give a Speech Without Getting Nervous

Last Updated: December 14, 2022 Approved

This article was co-authored by Lynn Kirkham . Lynn Kirkham is a Professional Public Speaker and Founder of Yes You Can Speak, a San Francisco Bay Area-based public speaking educational business empowering thousands of professionals to take command of whatever stage they've been given - from job interviews, boardroom talks to TEDx and large conference platforms. Lynn was chosen as the official TEDx Berkeley speaker coach for the last four years and has worked with executives at Google, Facebook, Intuit, Genentech, Intel, VMware, and others. There are 9 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. wikiHow marks an article as reader-approved once it receives enough positive feedback. In this case, several readers have written to tell us that this article was helpful to them, earning it our reader-approved status. This article has been viewed 312,771 times.

Do you dread giving a speech, or have an extreme fear of public speaking? It is possible to lessen your nervousness with some advance preparation. Start off by speaking to groups of people as often as you can. Practice your speech with your friends and family. Try to connect with your audience and don’t be afraid to make a few mistakes. Working off your extra energy before a speech will help you to focus as well.

Reducing Stress Beforehand

Step 1 Practice in front of small groups of supportive friends.

  • Think about people you know who have to give speeches or presentations on a regular basis. Ask them for their input and advice as you prepare.
  • Practicing in this way will also help you to become desensitized when speaking in front of groups of people. Do it often enough and it will become habit and nothing to worry about.
  • You can also join a local group, such as Toastmasters, to work on your skills. Or, you can even take a public speaking course at a local college or recreation center. [3] X Research source

Step 2 Spend more time practicing your intro.

  • Expect that your anxiety level will drop significantly after you’ve completed your introductory remarks and this will help you to relax for the rest of your talk.

Step 3 Film your practice sessions.

  • For example, you may find that you speak way too fast at the start of your speech. This is fixable by simply concentrating on slowing down early on.

Step 4 Check out the space in advance.

  • It is especially important that you check out the technology, such as the computer and projection screens, to make sure that they are functioning properly and compatible with any equipment that you’ll bring along. [6] X Research source
  • If you cannot look at the space well beforehand, try to arrive a little early for your speech and check everything out at that time.

Step 5 Talk with a therapist.

  • If social anxiety is not an issue, a therapist can also help you overcome a phobia of public speaking. A therapist or speech pathologist may also be able to work on treating public-speaking-induced speech disorders, if you suspect you suffer from such a problem.

Being Mentally Calm and Confident

Step 1 Be knowledgeable about your topic.

  • Just be careful that you don’t get overconfident and stray too far off of your prepared script. This can have the effect of making you seem even more nervous and frazzled.

Step 2 Be passionate about your topic.

  • Some people even find that repeating, “Yes!,” over and over again works wonders to decrease nerves. [12] X Research source
  • Take a deep breath and then think of your favorite speaker. Perhaps envision Abraham Lincoln giving a battlefield speech. Be inspired by their poise and try to emulate this as you take the stage.
  • Remember, though, not every speech will go exactly as visualized, and that is alright. The purpose of this exercise is to help bolster confidence. You cannot and should not expect to predict an audience's response.

Step 4 Establish rapport with your audience.

  • If you find yourself freezing up, locate a friendly face and then focus your stare right above them. Hold this position as you continue to talk. Move on whenever you feel your nerves lessening.

Step 5 Keep going if you make a mistake.

  • If you make an error, don't apologize. No one but you knows your speech! Just keep going, and save apologies for off-stage
  • Remind yourself that no one is expecting you to give a flawless speech. In fact, audiences often find small stumbles and other signs of being human relatable and even endearing. Try not to panic if you stumble. Instead, just focus on your recovery.

Step 6 Focus on a spot behind the audience.

Projecting Physical Calm and Confidence

Step 1 Work off some energy before your speech.

  • You may also want to do a quick body scan. Close your eyes, breathe in deeply, and focus on any areas where you feel yourself tensing your muscles. Take a deep breath in, and try to soften the tension as you exhale. [18] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good in Action An initiative by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center promoting science-based practices for a meaningful life Go to source

Step 3 Dress to fit the occasion.

  • Try your outfit on before you give your speech to make sure everything fits well and that you feel comfortable. This helps prevent awkward adjusting during your speech.

Step 4 Maintain confident body language.

  • Watch out for jittery behaviors, such as tapping your fingers or twirling a pen. Practicing a good deal will help you to spot these actions and work on eliminating them prior to your final speech. [21] X Research source

Expert Q&A

Lynn Kirkham

  • Remember that your audience wants to hear you and are interested in what you have to say. They want you to do well. [22] X Research source Thanks Helpful 1 Not Helpful 0
  • Drink a cup of water about 15-30 minutes before you take the stage. This will keep you hydrated and prevent you from getting dry mouth, a common sign of nervousness. [23] X Research source Thanks Helpful 1 Not Helpful 0

how to give a speech without getting emotional

  • Make sure to talk slowly if you are nervous. Don’t rush your words. [24] X Research source Thanks Helpful 1 Not Helpful 0

You Might Also Like

Overcome Your Fear of Public Speaking

  • ↑ Lynn Kirkham. Public Speaking Coach. Expert Interview. 20 November 2019.
  • ↑ http://time.com/89814/how-to-overcome-fear-of-public-speaking-and-give-a-great-presentation/
  • ↑ http://www.forbes.com/sites/carminegallo/2013/05/16/how-warren-buffett-and-joel-osteen-conquered-their-terrifying-fear-of-public-speaking/#1a4af754352a
  • ↑ https://collegeinfogeek.com/public-speaking-tips/
  • ↑ http://www.washington.edu/doit/presentation-tips-0
  • ↑ http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/specific-phobias/expert-answers/fear-of-public-speaking/faq-20058416
  • ↑ http://blog.ted.com/a-ted-speaker-coach-shares-11-tips-for-right-before-you-go-on-stage/
  • ↑ http://ggia.berkeley.edu/practice/body_scan_meditation
  • ↑ https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/5-ways-to-immediately-appear-more-confident/

About This Article

Lynn Kirkham

Medical Disclaimer

The content of this article is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, examination, diagnosis, or treatment. You should always contact your doctor or other qualified healthcare professional before starting, changing, or stopping any kind of health treatment.

Read More...

To give a speech without getting nervous, try taking deep breaths before and throughout your speech to help you calm down and release tension. During your speech, make sure to keep your back straight and stand tall as this will project confidence and help keep your breathing even. To avoid looking directly at anyone, focus on a spot behind the audience until you begin to feel more relaxed. These tips will help you in the short-term, however, if you often get nervous during speaking, be sure to learn as much as you can about your topic as this will equip you to improvise and answer questions. For more tips from our co-author, like how to establish rapport with your audience, read on! Did this summary help you? Yes No

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RHOC Cast Sheds New Light on Shannon’s Breakdown: “Never Seen Her Like This Before — Ever"

The RHOC cast opens up about Shannon Storms Beador's emotional moment in La Quinta.

how to give a speech without getting emotional

How to Watch

Watch The Real Housewives of Orange County on Thursdays at 9/8c and next day on  Peacock . Catch up on the Bravo App .

Shannon Storms Beador  is going through a tough time, but her friends are by her side for support. 

In the video above, Shannon's fellow The Real Housewives of Orange County cast members Heather Dubrow , Gina Kirschenheiter , and Emily Simpson spoke about how it felt seeing Shannon break down in front of them during their trip to La Quinta in Season 18, Episode 7.

"We all love Shannon. No one wants to see a friend broken like this. And honestly, I've never seen her like this before — ever," said Heather at the beginning of the clip.

The "this" she was referring to? Shannon's demeanor during their little getaway, which manifested in tears after they began speaking about a dramatic development in her life. 

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"I felt badly for Shannon," Emily added in the video above. "I just felt that it was important to rally around her and try to support her and make her feel that there are people in her corner."

Why Shannon Storms Beador broke down in tears during RHOC

In the episode, Shannon's tears began to fall during breakfast when she realized how nice it felt to be surrounded by women supporting her.

"You don't understand how overwhelmed with love I am. You guys are so kind, and that's why I feel I don't deserve any of it. I'm so grateful," she said. 

Shannon Beador crying while hugging Emily Simpson.

In the video above, she expanded on the sentiment.

"To be rallied around by those three women, of all people on the cast, it was overwhelming for me," she said. "I said, 'I'm not gonna cry this season' and darn it, I did. Quite a few times."

Gina Kirschenheiter and Shannon Storms Beador give an update on their friendship

Although Gina and Shannon have navigated some tough times in their friendship over the years, Gina explained in the video above that the way Shannon has handled recent life events has ultimately brought them closer together. 

"She is navigating through this authentically and very transparently and she really owes that to no one, but she's choosing to do that. I really respect her for that," said Gina before some tears entered her eyes. "I don't even know why I'm getting emotional, it's Shannon, but it is really nice for me because I've known Shannon for seven years now, and I felt like the entire time I knew her she never really saw me, and she  never really understood me . And she had it in her head who she thought I was, and there was nothing other than that, and I think that for whatever circumstances happened and brought us together, she now sees me for who I actually am, and that feels really nice."

She added, "I think also, for the majority of the time that I was on the show, she was in a toxic relationship, and I think that really affected a lot of her day-to-day decision making."

Shannon also had something to say about her relationship with Gina.

"The friendship that I have formed with Gina is so refreshing to me. It's an example of how you never know what's gonna happen in life," she noted. "I really didn't think that we would become as close as we did, or she would be as supportive as she has been with me."

Shop  The Real Housewives of Orange County  merch

Show off your  RHOC  fandom with exclusive items from  ShopByBravo.com .

To see more of the ladies, watch  The Real Housewives of Orange County  on Thursdays at 9/8c. Episodes stream the next day on Peacock.

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Bravoholics are invited to take a trip to Miami for a party unlike any other!  Bravo Fan Fest hits Miami  on Saturday, November 23 for a one-day event featuring panels, activations, photo opps, and over 25 Bravolebs. Tickets are now on sale at  www.BravoFanFest.com .

Plus, Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen is filming five shows from Miami on Thursday, November 21 and Friday, November 22, so now's your chance to make your Clubhouse debut. Buy tickets for WWHL in Miami now .

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  • Heather Dubrow
  • Shannon Storms Beador

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Professional Eulogy Writing

Eulogy writing guide, funeral speeches for a work colleague, tribute speech to dad from daughter, funeral speech writing advice, how to read a eulogy without crying.

  • February 24, 2024

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Dealing with the loss of a loved one is never easy. It's an emotionally charged time when memories flood your heart, and the task of reading a eulogy can seem insurmountable. However, delivering a powerful and heartfelt eulogy is an integral part of the healing process and a way to honour and celebrate the life of the person who has passed away.

Are you struggling to write a meaningful eulogy during this difficult time?  Our professional eulogy writing service can help you honour your loved one in less than 48 hours, with no additional stress. We help you preserve the legacy of a cherished life, in your time of grief. Find out more →

Table of Contents

1. Prepare, practice, and rehearse

What are some techniques to prevent crying while reading a eulogy, how can i prepare myself mentally to read a eulogy, can i take breaks while reading the eulogy, what if i become too emotional to continue, what should i do if i start crying in the middle of the eulogy, how can i ensure a steady voice while reading a eulogy, what should i focus on to prevent crying, is it acceptable to show emotions while delivering a eulogy, how can i make the eulogy more engaging for the listeners, can i include humor in the eulogy, should i write down the eulogy or speak from memory, how can i personalize the eulogy to honor the deceased effectively, what is the appropriate length for a eulogy, can i use quotes or poems in the eulogy, how can i end the eulogy on a positive note, what should i keep in mind regarding the tone of the eulogy, how can i manage my nervousness before delivering the eulogy, how can i engage the audience during the eulogy, can i invite others to share their memories during the eulogy, 2. focus on your breathing, 3. accept your emotions, 4. use prompts or printed text, 5. visualise success, useful example, how to read a eulogy without crying - faq section.

If you're wondering how to read a eulogy without crying, you're not alone. In this blog post, we'll provide guidance on delivering a meaningful tribute while keeping your emotions in check, and how using Eulogy Assistant can help create a personalised and captivating eulogy.

The more familiar you are with the eulogy, the more comfortable you'll feel while delivering it. Start by writing a thoughtful and personalised tribute, which can be made easier with Eulogy Assistant . Then, practice reading it aloud multiple times. This will not only help you become more familiar with the text, but also identify emotional triggers to better anticipate and prepare for them.

Controlling your breathing is crucial in managing your emotions during your speech. Take deep breaths before and during your eulogy, and try to maintain a steady pace of inhaling and exhaling. If you find yourself becoming too emotional, pause for a moment and take a deep breath before continuing.

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It's completely natural to feel emotional during such a poignant moment. Embrace your feelings and give yourself permission to be human – no one expects you to be stoic and emotionless. If you tear up or need a moment, it's okay. Acknowledging your emotions can help you regain control and keep moving forward.

Having a printed copy of your eulogy or note cards with bullet points can help you stay on track and feel more secure. If you lose your place, simply refer to your text or prompts to quickly get back on track. This can also serve as an emotional anchor, helping you refocus on the content rather than your emotions.

Before delivering the eulogy, take a few moments to visualise yourself successfully reading it. This can help build your confidence and create a positive mindset. Picture yourself at the podium, looking out at the audience, feeling composed and delivering your heartfelt tribute with grace.

Imagine you're asked to deliver the eulogy for a dear friend named Sarah. You're nervous about breaking down while reading it.

First, write the eulogy using the Eulogy Assistant , incorporating stories of Sarah's compassionate nature and love for adventure. Then, practice reading it aloud multiple times, paying special attention to triggers like recalling Sarah's laughter or how she supported you in your time of need.

Before the service, take a few minutes to breathe and visualise yourself delivering the eulogy. Have a printed copy of the eulogy in your hands, with key phrases highlighted. As you read aloud, focus on your breathing – deep, slow breaths.

Finally, remember that emotions are natural, and no one will fault you for showing them. Instead, take any emotional pauses as an opportunity to breathe and regain composure, ultimately honouring Sarah's memory with grace.

To prevent crying while reading a eulogy, you can try to focus on your breathing, take regular pauses to compose yourself, and try to detach yourself slightly from the emotional weight of the moment. Additionally, rehearsing the eulogy multiple times before the actual service can help you get accustomed to the content, making it easier to read without crying.

Preparing mentally involves finding a calm and focused state of mind. You might find it helpful to meditate or pray before you begin. It's also beneficial to remember the purpose of the eulogy: to honor and celebrate the life of the deceased, and to provide comfort and closure for the living.

Absolutely, taking breaks while reading the eulogy is not only allowed but encouraged. It gives you a moment to collect your thoughts and emotions. It also provides a moment of reflection for the listeners.

If you find yourself too emotional to continue, it's perfectly acceptable to have a backup person who can step in to finish reading the eulogy for you. It shows the depth of your feelings and the closeness of your relationship with the deceased.

If you start crying in the middle of the eulogy, take a moment to compose yourself. You can pause, take a deep breath, and continue when you feel ready. It's important to show yourself compassion and allow yourself to express your grief.

To ensure a steady voice, it might be helpful to keep a glass of water nearby and to take deep, steady breaths. Focusing on your breath can help stabilize your voice.

To prevent crying, try to focus on the positive memories and the love you shared with the deceased. Keeping your focus on honoring their memory, rather than on your loss, can sometimes make it easier to get through the eulogy without crying.

Absolutely, showing emotion is a natural and accepted part of delivering a eulogy. It is a testament to your genuine connection with the deceased, and many find that it helps them to connect with their listeners during this emotional time.

To make the eulogy more engaging, you can include anecdotes, stories, and personal experiences that you shared with the deceased. Painting a vivid picture of their personality, their likes, and their accomplishments can help the listeners feel closer to them.

Yes, including moments of light-heartedness or humor can be a beautiful addition to a eulogy. It can help to lift the spirits of the attendees and provide a more rounded representation of the deceased's personality.

Writing down the eulogy is generally recommended, as it helps to organize your thoughts clearly and prevents you from forgetting important points during an emotionally charged moment.

Personalizing the eulogy can be done by including specific memories, anecdotes, and details about the deceased's life and personality. Mentioning their hobbies, passions, and achievements can also make the eulogy more personal and heartfelt.

The appropriate length for a eulogy can vary, but generally, it should be around 5-10 minutes long. It should be concise enough to hold the listeners' attention while also providing a comprehensive tribute to the deceased.

Yes, incorporating quotes, poems, or scriptures that were meaningful to the deceased or that encapsulate their spirit can be a touching addition to the eulogy.

To end the eulogy on a positive note, you can express the hope and comfort found in the memories shared with the deceased, and encourage others to keep their memory alive through stories and shared experiences.

Keeping the tone respectful, heartfelt, and genuine is important. While it is okay to include light-hearted moments, the overall tone should be one of reverence and honor towards the deceased.

Managing nervousness can be achieved through deep breathing, grounding techniques, and focusing on the purpose of the eulogy, which is to honor the life and contributions of the deceased. A well-structured eulogy that captures the essence of the person is likely to be memorable.

Engaging the audience can be done by making eye contact, modulating your voice to convey emotion, and by encouraging others to reflect on their own memories of the deceased during the eulogy.

Yes, inviting others to share their memories can be a beautiful way to involve the community in the commemoration and to create a more comprehensive picture of the deceased's life.

Delivering a eulogy without crying poses a unique challenge, but with adequate preparation, focus, and acceptance of your emotions, you can pay tribute to your loved one in a heartfelt and memorable way. By using Eulogy Assistant , not only will you be able to create a thoughtful and personalised tribute, but also give yourself tools to deliver it with strength and poise. In the words of Leo Buscaglia, "Death is a challenge. It tells us not to waste time. It tells us to tell each other right now that we love each other." Let your eulogy be a celebration of that love, and may it shine as a beacon of hope and remembrance.

Looking For Examples? Here Are Some of The Best Eulogies

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COMMENTS

  1. How to Give a Speech Without Crying? 10 great tips

    Table of Contents. How to Give a Speech Without Crying. #1 Breathe Deep. #2 How to Give a Speech Without Crying Using Humor. #3 Acknowledge Your Emotions. #4 Pause for Reflection and Composure. #5 Focus on Your Notes. #6 Focus on the Mundane. #7 Take a Drink of Water.

  2. A simple trick to help you speak in public without showing your nerves

    Hold up your index finger a few inches in front of your mouth. As you exhale steadily, make a "Wooooooo" noise (think: little kid pretending to be a ghost) for 5 to 10 seconds. Do this 5 to 10 times. (Watch her demonstrate it here .) "This … essentially relaxes the vocal folds," says Gartner-Schmidt. "It establishes breath and air ...

  3. Public Speaking Without Getting Emotional

    Prepare Mentally and Physically. The better prepared you are, the less likely you'll get emotional during public speaking. Know your material inside and out, and practice your delivery until it's perfect. 3. Use Visualization Techniques. This technique helps athletes prep for competition and works well for public speakers too.

  4. Keep Your Cool: 8 Strategies to Control Emotions While Speaking

    Strategies that individuals can employ to manage nerves, anxiety, or control emotions before speaking engagements include: 1. Preparation and Practice: Thorough preparation and rehearsal can boost confidence and reduce anxiety by increasing familiarity with the material and the speaking environment. Practice allows individuals to refine their ...

  5. How to Control Your Emotions When Speaking: 10 Tips

    But try to keep in mind that we've all been there and most of us (the good ones, at least) understand. 2. Practice Aloud. When you are able to anticipate a tough emotional moment it can be helpful to talk it out. Rehearse your message over and over, out loud, until you feel reasonably comfortable with it. 3.

  6. How to Give a Speech: 10 Tips for Powerful Public Speaking

    4. Take Deep Breaths: Before and during the speech, take a few deep breaths as this will help calm nerves and make sure your breathing is regulated throughout the duration of your presentation. 5. Speak Slowly: It is common to feel anxious while giving a speech and try to rush through it too quickly.

  7. How to Control Your Emotions During a Difficult Conversation

    But it's possible to interrupt this response and clear a path towards entering into a more productive discussion. Start by taking a deep breath and focusing on your body. Repeat a mantra to ...

  8. Clarity of Speech: Proven Strategies for Clear Communication

    Pause for Emphasis: Strategic pauses give you time to think of the right words and allow your audience to absorb your message. Use pauses to highlight key points and give your speech a natural rhythm. Project Your Voice: Ensure you're speaking loudly enough to be heard without straining your voice. Good posture and breathing from your ...

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    When anxiety over public speaking creeps up, you may experience psychological and physical symptoms. Some psychological symptoms you might have include: feelings of intense worry and nervousness ...

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    We receive thousands of applications every day, but we only work with the top 5% of speakers.. Book a call with our team to get started — you'll learn why the vast majority of our students get a paid speaking gig within 90 days of finishing our program.. If you're ready to control your schedule, grow your income, and make an impact in the world - it's time to take the first step.

  11. 6 techniques for clear and compelling speech

    Building block #5: Exaggeration. In the same way that we get breathless when they're speaking with passion, our speech distorts in another significant way. We exaggerate. So when we're sitting down to a meal after having eaten little that day, we tell our family and friends: "I love this pizza.".

  12. Five Ways To Speak Passionately Without Getting Too Emotional

    5. Clarity. When speaking passionately, your points still need to flow logically from one to the next, always making sure to emphasize the main idea you want to get across. You're not overly ...

  13. Nervous About Public Speaking? Try This.

    Here are four steps you can take before your next big speech or presentation. First, take a few minutes to center yourself. Pause and breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth.

  14. How to Shake Off a Hurtful Comment

    You get toxic positivity, e.g., you're told "keep the faith and it will happen" when you have no guarantee of success. Someone expresses how easily they do something you find difficult.

  15. Moved to Tears-Ten More Tips for Not Crying During Your Speech

    pressing your tongue to the roof of your mouth or up against your teeth. squeezing something, like part of your clothing, or if you're lucky, a loved one's hand. Clench your fists as tightly as you can. Accompany by breathing in deeply and quickly through your nose, and slowly out either through your nose or mouth.

  16. To Overcome Your Fear of Public Speaking, Stop Thinking About Yourself

    Showing kindness and generosity to others has been shown to activate the vagus nerve, which has the power to calm the fight-or-flight response. When we are kind to others, we tend to feel calmer ...

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    Some of the speeches are downright scary, while others are joyous and uplifting. Regardless, the focus on so many speeches in such a condensed period of time emphasizes the power of the spoken word.

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    Tell your audience why. Share your personal story as a way to illustrate why it's so important that they listen up. If you have a message you feel compelled to deliver, keep your emotions in check ...

  19. Show Your Emotions: The Actor's Secret to Powerful Public Speaking

    Think of a desert: the land stretching away in every direction without anything to break the monotony. That's what a featureless speech feels like to an audience. Memorability in speaking means giving a talk exactly the way you intend it to come across. Your pace must be comfortable for you while allowing listeners to relax and absorb what ...

  20. Big Girls Won't Cry: Ten Tips to Avert Tears when Speaking in Public

    Saying it over and over—out loud and possibly in front of a mirror- will drain some of the emotion out of the thought or memory. If you do it enough times, those words become…just words. Once you can say it without your throat closing up and your eyes filling, you can start to put some of the emotion back into your delivery.

  21. What To Do When You Get Emotional During A Speech

    2. Take a Moment. If you get choked up for a moment, stop talking for a few seconds instead of rushing through your remarks - just put your head down and pause for a few seconds, then look up and continue when you're ready. If you're more than just momentarily choked up and fear you may not be able to continue at all, you may need to move ...

  22. Emotion in Public Speaking: Why It Matters

    Emotion in Public Speaking: Why It Matters. If you're in the business of giving presentations, you're in the business of delivering emotion. Every actor who has ever performed has understood this, as has every great speaker. To succeed in your own talks and presentations, you should understand it too. The good news is that this dynamic is an ...

  23. 3 Ways to Give a Speech Without Getting Nervous

    3. Film your practice sessions. Get a small camera and go find a room that is similar to the one that you'll be speaking in. Set up your camera and record yourself giving your full speech. Try to recreate the final scenario as closely as possible, minus the audience. It even helps if you dress the part.

  24. Gina Kirschenheiter & Emily Simpson Give Friendship Update (VIDEO

    "Sometimes you get a little jealous or a little bit, like, insecure. Friends are going to fight!" Gina told BravoTV.com in an exclusive sit-down (you can watch the clip above!).

  25. RHOC Cast Reacts to Shannon Storms Beador's Emotional Breakdown

    Shannon Storms Beador is going through a tough time, but her friends are by her side for support.. In the video above, Shannon's fellow The Real Housewives of Orange County cast members Heather ...

  26. How to Read the Eulogy without Crying

    Tip 2: Acknowledge your emotions at the beginning of the eulogy and/or throughout. Tell people about the "pink elephant" in the room. You can say something like, "Hello. I will be reading the eulogy. I am feeling emotional right now, but I will do the best I can to read the eulogy.".

  27. How To Read A Eulogy Without Crying

    It's completely natural to feel emotional during such a poignant moment. Embrace your feelings and give yourself permission to be human - no one expects you to be stoic and emotionless. If you tear up or need a moment, it's okay. Acknowledging your emotions can help you regain control and keep moving forward. 4. Use prompts or printed text

  28. How to control your emotions when delivering a Eulogy

    Breathe - a key way to prepare physically is to breathe deeply before your speech. Continue to consciously breathe during the speech too. When delivering the Eulogy, if there are emotional moments, such as mentioning a memory or a person, take a breath. Before you deliver the sentence. Be conscious of where they moments are in the speech.